StarClan Prophecy Time! by Rosefur

Rosefur shares a funny sneak peak at how StarClan makes prophecies. 

Art by emo kid

Here is a question that is hard to answer. How exactly does StarClan come up with its cryptic prophecies? Well, let’s see!
*In StarClan*
Bluestar: Hey, do you think it’s time for a prophecy?
Feathertail: *checks watch* It IS time for a prophecy!
Yellowfang: Since when did you get a watch?
Feathertail: Pfft. Everyone has watches. It’s like fidget spinners.
Yellowfang: Uh…
Bluestar: YO! GUYS! Back on topic.
Feathertail: How do we make a prophecy again?
Bluestar: Easy! First, come up with a list of random ominous sounding phrases.
Yellowfang: I GOT ONE! Darkness will come when… when…
Feathertail: When the moon sets and… uh…
Bluestar: OOH OOH! When the moon sets and shadow covers the land!
Yellowfang: Sounds good to me.
Feathertail: Yep.
Bluestar: *ahem* “Darkness will come when the moon sets and shadow covers the land.” OK! On to the next one.
Feathertail: The mouse will get caught-
Yellowfang: BY MEEEEE!!!
Bluestar: NOOOO BY ME!
Windstar: Excuse me? What is going on here? Are you guys… making prophecies….????
Bluestar: Yah. Fetch me a mouse okay? So the prophecy will come true! *winks*
Windstar: *shakes head sadly* Modern day cats are so odd.
Tallstar: Hey! Why are you guys making prophecies without WindClan???
Bluestar: Oh. Sorry.
Tallstar: I have a prophecy: “Tallstar is the best and is super cool and will get lots of prey and is the best StarClan cat ever.”
Bluestar: I think you mixed it up. The prophecy is “Bluestar is the best and is super cool and will get lots of prey and is the best StarClan cat ever.”
Feathertail: Guys, our prophecy is due in an hour.
Yellowfang: How long IS an hour?
Bluestar: Alright, let’s see what we’ve come up with.
Feathertail: Darkness will come when the moon sets and shadow covers the land.
Bluestar: The fog shall defeat the stars if it continues to grow
Yellowfang: My fangs are yellow.
Bluestar: Wait, really?
Yellowfang: *blushes* HAHA LET’S CHANGE THE TOPIC
Feathertail: The flame will burn brightest in the darkness
Bluestar: The bird’s cry will signal the dawn.
Yellowfang: I like to growl.
Bluestar: Good job everyone! I think that’s all.
Yellowfang: WAIT! I still have four more! *clears throat* Owls are birds. Fire is hot and will burn you if you touch it. Cats have four legs and walk on them. I am amazing.
Bluestar: Ooooookaaaay…
Feathertail: *chuckles nervously* Well, that’s all for now! StarClan out!

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  27 Replies to “StarClan Prophecy Time! by Rosefur”

  1. Sky
    August 27, 2017 at 11:33 pm

    That was hilarious!

    Founder of BlogJail. Evil....?

  2. Windspirit
    August 28, 2017 at 12:20 am

    Hilarious!!! I loved it!!!! 🐱🐱🐱😺😺😺😺😸😸😸

  3. Bluefire of Stormclan
    August 28, 2017 at 12:37 am

    Thunderstar: Guys did you seriously just make up those prophecies? No wonder you can’t explain what they mean!!
    Bluestar: Oh come on, don’t tell me you’ve never made up a prophecy!
    Thunderstar: . . .
    Thunderstar: Dude. Not cool.
    Skystar: Leave Thunderstar alone, Firestar!
    Thunderstar: Stay out of this, Skystar! I don’t need you to fight my battles for me!
    Skystar: But I’m just trying to help…
    Thunderstar: I DON’T NEED YOUR HELP!!!
    All other cats: . . . . . .
    Thunderstar: Forget this. I’m outta here.
    Bluestar; Where are you going?”
    Thunderstar: I’m being alive again. BYE!!
    Bluestar: Wait, you can’t do that!! Can you?
    Thunderstar: I’m about to find out! *concentrates* *disappears*
    Bluestar: WHAAAT??!?!?!?!?!?!!!
    Firestar: Did he just become alive again?


    *Thunderstar appears in the middle of camp*
    All Thunderclan cats: AAAAHHHHHH WHAT THE DARK FOREST???
    Thunderstar: Hi! I’m Thunderstar. I– WAIT A SECOND I’M FREAKING ALIVE AGAIN!!! I didn’t know I could to that!
    Jayfeather: Wait WHAT?? How the Dark Forest are you alive???
    Bramblestar: Are you coming to take over Thunderclan? Cause you’ll have to go through me!!
    Thunderstar: Come on, I was leader first!
    Eaglekit: You’re all squabbling like a bunch of kits!
    All of Thunderclan: . . . . .
    Lionblaze: It must be really bad if a KIT had to say that.
    Alderheart: No kidding.
    Sparkpelt: Raise your paws if you think Thunderstar should rule the lake.
    *dead silence. No one raises their paw*
    Thunderstar: Dangit.


    Bluestar: He can do that?
    Firestar: Hey, maybe we can do that too!! *concentrates, disappears*
    Bluestar: . . . Come on, Firestar, really? . . . What the Dark Forest, why not. *concentrates, disappears*
    Yellowfang: Guys… this is not going to end well.
    Mosskit: Mama’s going crazy, isn’t she?
    Oakheart: Hush, Mosskit. Go play with Stonefur.
    Mosskit: Okay! *runs off*
    Tallstar: This is a nightmare.


    • Nightflower
      August 28, 2017 at 2:17 am


    • Hazelpaw(moon)
      August 28, 2017 at 12:31 pm


      • Cloudpaw seriously needs mentor
        August 31, 2017 at 9:51 pm


    • Witch the Disney Musical
      August 28, 2017 at 8:56 pm


    • Windspirit
      August 29, 2017 at 12:51 am


    • Owlfeather
      August 30, 2017 at 9:01 pm

      love it!!!!!

      mew mew

  4. Nightflower
    August 28, 2017 at 2:17 am

    Wow Rosefur! I love the way how you make it seem like a role play, it is super amazing and fun!

  5. Hazelpaw(moon)
    August 28, 2017 at 12:31 pm

    Great job, Rosefur! It was hilarious!

    • Cloudpaw seriously needs mentor
      August 31, 2017 at 9:51 pm


  6. Witch the Disney Musical
    August 28, 2017 at 8:55 pm

    Good job Rosefur! 🙂 This was SO funny. 🙂

    August 29, 2017 at 5:47 pm

    This was awesome!!!

  8. Owlfeather
    August 30, 2017 at 9:02 pm

    Awesome!!! do more of them!!!!

    mew mew


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