Screaming about Into the Wild by Blackburr

Blackburr looks back on the first half of “Into the Wild”.

Art by Moonkitti

WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR BASICALLY ALL OF INTO THE WILD.

DEEP BREATH* OKAY.
As we know, Into The Wild is the first of many, many, many, many, many, many, many, MANY, warrior cat books. And personally, Into The Wild is my favorite book *couGh* aka the only book I can remember. *couGH* Not because I can remember it, but because it is so like, adventurous, and Into The Wild is the only book in which I enjoy Firepaws character, pSSHT, in my opinion, Firestar and his kin is terrIBLE. But I’ll explain this in a later article. Onto the look back!

Alright, so. In the first chapter we get placed in Rusty’s mind. Rusty is like, hunting in the wide wide forest because he’s bored or hungry I don’t quite remember. But right before Rusty catches the mousey, he wakes up and boOSH the mouse is gone and rusty is back home in his twoleg den. Apparently he was dreaming about being in the forest and doing all of that cool cat stuff #RustyWantsToBeACoolCat . So then, he gets up and walks over to his food bowl and is like ‘EW I don’t wanna eat this’ and escapes his house through an open window. Apparently, Rusty’s best friend, Smudge is waiting outside for him ‘Where ya goin, rusty?’ Smudge asks Rusty or something like that ‘inTO THE FOREST’ rusty replies ‘oh no there are a bunch of meanies there don’t go rusty!1!1!1’ smudge gasps and flies off into space. ‘Oh well’ rusty shrugs then wanders off into the forest. *rustle rustle rustle* oh look there rusty there’s a mouse. So, rusty just sits here staring at the mouse for like a year before he pounces, soon, he pounces but the mouse skiddaddles away. Right after, Greypaw pounces from somewhere and attacks rusty, somehow, rusty manages to fend off a trained wild cat and wins. The two introduce themselves and Rusty learns about the clans. Then after the chatting, Lionheart and Bluestar slip up into this conversation, and Bluestar is getting all anGRY at Rusty for wanting to hunt.

OK! Chapter two, finally. From here out, I’m just gonna talk about the big important details. Mainly because I’m getting lazy, but also because my fingers are hurting and I wanna get this over with ASAP.

OK, so in Chapter Two, Bluestar basically chills herself and offers Rusty a job at ThunderClan and rusty is all like ‘OK let me think’ and then he goes home and thinks about it. He says goodbye to Smudge, and spends his last night at home. Then he runs off into the forest again, ‘OK I’ll accept your offer’ Rusty then has to run and almost kill himself go get to ThunderClan camp cause Lionheart doesn’t play games.

Okay skipping to being in camp and everything, Rusty gets to join ThunderClan and everyones like ‘omg where is this kiddo from?’ Then Longtail is like ‘He’s a Kitty pet!!! 11!11!’ And attacs poor rusty. #StopRustyAbuse. Rusty somehow fends off a fully grown and trained warrior and rips off his ear. Then, Bluestar names Rusty Firepaw because of his fire like fur.
But Bluestars clearly like ‘fire alone will save the clan. Dis kiddo will save my clan *staring intensifies*’ and yeah, onto the next scene.

Then, Ravenpaw comes in here all like ‘omgee Redtails dead he was killed by ti- Oakheart yeah Oakheart.’ and everyone except Firepaw believes him. Firepaw is like ‘That Tigerclaw guy is mean, and he scary so I dun like him… IMA blame it on him’ and then he goes to investigate #FirepawisSherlockHolmes

Okay, guys! Thats basically it for this article! My fingers feel like they are burning, and I need to sleep! Byeeee!

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  23 Replies to “Screaming about Into the Wild by Blackburr”

  1. Dovekit
    September 1, 2017 at 11:07 pm

    OMSC this article is hilarious! Although, If someone asked me what “Into the Wild” was, I probably would say something a little more…Descriptive.




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    • September 5, 2017 at 2:28 pm

      I mean, this isn’t really supposed to be anything descriptive. It’s just supposed to be a funny little skit.




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  2. Lightningfall
    September 1, 2017 at 11:21 pm

    Lionheart doesn’t play games XD




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  3. Owlfeather
    September 2, 2017 at 12:13 am

    nice article!! funny!


    mew mew




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  4. Owlfeather
    September 2, 2017 at 12:14 am

    funny!!! 😉


    mew mew




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  5. September 2, 2017 at 8:51 am

    Hilarious! 😛




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  6. Witchheart the Disney Musical
    September 2, 2017 at 2:24 pm

    Haha! 😛 🙂


    Pray to our God, the Father




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  7. Cinnamondapple
    September 3, 2017 at 9:48 pm

    #StopRustyAbuse lol I love it!!




    1
  8. Windspirit
    September 3, 2017 at 9:59 pm

    IMA blame it on him!
    I never thought of it that way…..




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  9. Duskpaw (Duskswirl)
    September 9, 2017 at 2:21 am

    this article is so funny!!!!!!!!! good job!
    😛
    #StopRustyAbuse #FirepawisSherlockHolmes


    This is my signature. #effort




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