The Herbivore, A Magizine, Issue 1; by Jayfeather

Today an article by Lionpaw that needs no introduction. Instead, just… read on, my buddies.

Hello, my name is Lionpaw Jayfeather, and my new magazine – the Herbivore – is for all those cats who adore herbs, like me and Runningnose, and basically any other green-pawed cat.
In this magazine, you shall find:cat-eating-a-broccoli-234

  • How you can live through leafbare without prey
  • The day The Herbivore was introduced to the clans

How You Can Live Through Leafbare Without Prey!

So, you know about traveling herbs right? You know, the ones that stop you from being hungry for a whole day. So – I think – in the books, no medicine cat had ever ran out when a cat has gone on a journey. So if cats would also “hunt” for traveling herbs, not just prey, during the whole year, then no cat would go hungry again, though it would help if you had some fresh kill during the year. Yet, you would only have a little bit of protein for a whole season. Though you would get your five-a-day. Wow, that was shorter that I thought it would be, maybe my paws aren’t big enough. Ah well, it’s the thought that counts.

The Day The Herbivore Was Introduced To The Clans!

Firestar: And now ThunderClan’s news. We are all happy, still got four paws and all still working – except Briarlight of course, and now Jayfeather would like to share some news with you. (As Jayfeather begins to speak, Firestar begins to twiddle with his claws.)

Jayfeather: I would just like to introduce my new magazine The Hebivore.-

(He is about to hold up the magazine when he is interrupted by Hollyleaf.)

Hollyleaf: (Hisses in Jayfeather’s ear.) Your standing the wrong way round.

(A mutter of amusement comes from the crowd while Jayfeather turns around.)

Jayfeather: Before I was rudely interrupted (Jayfeather shoots a glance at Hollyleaf.) , I would like to show you my magazine. (He holds magazine high into the air.)

Hollyleaf: (Whispers in ear again.) You’re holding it upside-down.

(Jayfeather turns the magazine the right way while shooting a glare aimed for Hollyleaf but at Brambleclaw instead because of his “poor eyesight”.)

Jayfeather: In this magazine there are all sorts of facts about herbs and plants. Of course, there may be typos, as I am blind and I may have tapped a couple of wrong keys along the way.

(He opens the magazine to show the cats what it says inside.)

Hollyleaf: Wrong page buddy.

( Jayfeather turns to the right page with a hiss of annoyance and shows the writing again. ” AO7EFA[BWR A[08WEGFBAJ EUWCDJF AIDJFABSDJF DUFD DFAB;O8RSAUD” The others seem to understand anyway, as they all would have written the magazine that way.)

Blackstar: Way to go Jayfeather! Your wtiting is as good as J. K. G-Rowling!

Lionblaze: Yeah! A Michael Mor-purr-go in the making!

(The shouts of approval go on until Jayfeather begins to purr and smile.)

Firestar: (Firestar stops twiddling with his claws.) Did you just… Purr?

Jayfeather: (Grinning.) You bet I did!

(Mistystar falls of her branch in shock, while Leafpool and Crowfeather faint.)

Jayfeather: Why is everyone so quiet? (He is blind so he doesn’t see the unconsious cats.)

Hollyleaf: (After a long time.) You just smiled and purred within the same 5 seconds.

Jayfeather: So what?

Ashfur: You used to be like all grouchy and all.

Jayfeather: Thanks for the heads up.

Thank you for reading my mini magizine: The Herbivore. I shall write more sentences in the future!

 

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