StarClan Prophecy Time! by Rosefur

Rosefur shares a funny sneak peak at how StarClan makes prophecies. 

Art by emo kid

Here is a question that is hard to answer. How exactly does StarClan come up with its cryptic prophecies? Well, let’s see!
*In StarClan*
Bluestar: Hey, do you think it’s time for a prophecy?
Feathertail: *checks watch* It IS time for a prophecy!
Yellowfang: Since when did you get a watch?
Feathertail: Pfft. Everyone has watches. It’s like fidget spinners.
Yellowfang: Uh…
Bluestar: YO! GUYS! Back on topic.
Feathertail: How do we make a prophecy again?
Bluestar: Easy! First, come up with a list of random ominous sounding phrases.
Yellowfang: I GOT ONE! Darkness will come when… when…
Feathertail: When the moon sets and… uh…
Bluestar: OOH OOH! When the moon sets and shadow covers the land!
Yellowfang: Sounds good to me.
Feathertail: Yep.
Bluestar: *ahem* “Darkness will come when the moon sets and shadow covers the land.” OK! On to the next one.
Feathertail: The mouse will get caught-
Yellowfang: BY MEEEEE!!!
Bluestar: NOOOO BY ME!
Windstar: Excuse me? What is going on here? Are you guys… making prophecies….????
Bluestar: Yah. Fetch me a mouse okay? So the prophecy will come true! *winks*
Windstar: *shakes head sadly* Modern day cats are so odd.
Tallstar: Hey! Why are you guys making prophecies without WindClan???
Bluestar: Oh. Sorry.
Tallstar: I have a prophecy: “Tallstar is the best and is super cool and will get lots of prey and is the best StarClan cat ever.”
Bluestar: I think you mixed it up. The prophecy is “Bluestar is the best and is super cool and will get lots of prey and is the best StarClan cat ever.”
Feathertail: Guys, our prophecy is due in an hour.
Everybody: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Yellowfang: How long IS an hour?
*later*
Bluestar: Alright, let’s see what we’ve come up with.
Feathertail: Darkness will come when the moon sets and shadow covers the land.
Bluestar: The fog shall defeat the stars if it continues to grow
Yellowfang: My fangs are yellow.
Bluestar: Wait, really?
Yellowfang: *blushes* HAHA LET’S CHANGE THE TOPIC
Feathertail: The flame will burn brightest in the darkness
Bluestar: The bird’s cry will signal the dawn.
Yellowfang: I like to growl.
Bluestar: Good job everyone! I think that’s all.
Yellowfang: WAIT! I still have four more! *clears throat* Owls are birds. Fire is hot and will burn you if you touch it. Cats have four legs and walk on them. I am amazing.
Bluestar: Ooooookaaaay…
Feathertail: *chuckles nervously* Well, that’s all for now! StarClan out!

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