Mapledrift shares xer opinion on Bumblestripe and his actions.
Hello, I occasionally see some people trying to defend Bumblestripe and as someone who has a personal hatred towards the man I’d like to formulate my feelings and emotions into an article
So, here it is
Bumblestripe and many other cats in the clan were constantly pressuring Dovewing to get into a relationship with him. Whenever she displayed a lack of interest, instead of moving on from that situation, he proceeded to sulk and essentially mope about how it was cruel of Dovewing to reject him. I distinctly remember some other cat getting annoyed at Dovewing for being mean when all she was doing was rejecting romantic advances. This is incredibly hard to respond to, as what are you meant to say in response ? Oh of course I will date this man that I am not attracted to now that you’ve said that or seem cold hearted and ignore the comment – Dovewing is forced into a situation where she has no option but to feel bad for her actions
That constant pressure on someone can make them feel like they should be reciprocating feelings, when there are no feelings. Here are some thoughts that might cross the mind of a person in this situation :
“Am I being too harsh ?”
“He’s a really nice guy, maybe I should give him a chance”
“I don’t want to make him upset”
So yes, he was pressuring her, whether he meant to or not, the pressure was there by his actions. In reality if someone denies feelings for you, you shouldn’t continually pursue that person, they’ve given their answer. Bumblestripe refuses to accept no as an answer. This isn’t love, it’s infatuation and obsession to the point where he doesn’t actually care about Dovewing’s feelings. Overtime, Dovewing may have began to mix up the feelings of friendship and a crush, to the point where she “returned” Bumblestripe’s feelings even though her true emotions weren’t romantic.
Now we get onto the time when Dovewing and Bumblestripe were mates.
Throughout their whole relationship, Dovewing seemed incredibly uncomfortable . It appeared that she settled for him instead of pursuing a relationship with him because actual feelings blossomed, which is a huge red flag for an unhealthy relationship
Also, Bumblestripe seemed to constantly bring up the concept of having children with Dovewing, even after she expressed discomfort with this idea many times. Even at her close friend (Purdy )’s funeral, Bumblestripe again brought up the idea of having kittens with her.
This constant pestering and and not listening to Dovewing’s opinions are more huge red flags for any relationship, especially with a topic like children. Dovewing was CLEARLY not interested in having children with Bumblestripe which is, after all, entirely her choice. She is her own person and she can make that choice. Yet Bumblestripe doesn’t let it go. He always brings it up, showing again how he doesn’t care about her own personal feelings, only caring about what HE wants out of this relationship. It also highlights how he seems to think that pressuring her into these things is ok, which it absolutely is not.
Whilst he’s trying to convince her to have kits with him, he uses backhanded compliments, complimenting her “motherly abilities”. These are absolutely signs of manipulation as he is complimenting her only to get what he wants out of her. He was still too caught up in his fantasy world to see that he was bothering her, and at this point I don’t think he truly cared.
All in all, Bumblestripe pressures Dovewing into a relationship regardless of her feelings for him. He continues to pressure her so that he can get what he thinks is the perfect future for both of them even when Dovewing clearly doesn’t share these feelings and it is negatively impacting her. He feels like he is entitled to get what he wants, when he really is not.
Thank you so much for reading, feel free to talk about your thoughts on Bumblestripe in the comments. Also, a fun fact, this article was actually originally a comment that I edited and added to create an article. If anyone can find the original comment you win my undying respect