BlogClan Tavern, Fifth Avenue

Round two of Incorrect Warrior Cat Quotes, everyone! Big announcement, I’m going to try to make this into a series I’ll post on the Tavern, so keep an eye out for any future installments!
Let’s BEGIN!
By the way, most of these are cats!
————–
Leafkit: *softly rubbing Cinderpelt’s cheeks*soft and squishy, soft and squish…
Cinderpelt: *looking down, amused*
Leafkit: *softly rubbing Yellowfang’s cheeks*soft and squishy, soft and squishy…
Yellowfang: *Bites her*
Leafkit: OW! SHARP AND POINTY!! SHARP AND POINTY!!
————
Dustpaw: Fireheart’s eyes are just plain. Nothing special-
Sandpaw, Cinderpelt, and Spottedleaf: THEY’RE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SHADE OF GREEN I HAVE EVER SEEN, ARE YOU BLIND? WHEN THE SUN HITS THEM SUDDENLY THEY ARE BRILLIANT AND CLEAR! THEY ARE FULL OF DEPTH YOU CAN’T EVEN BEGIN TO FATHOM! THEY ARE-
Dustpaw: *smirks*
Sandpaw:
Sandpaw: don’t
—————–
Fireheart: *goes on Tumblr and screams*
Darkstripe: WHAT IS IT?
Fireheart: DARKFIRE!?!?!?!?*shows Darkstripe*
Darkstripe: *gasps*It’s so…. CUTE!
Fireheart: DARKSTRIPE NO!
—————
How warrior ships work
GRAYFIRE
Fireheart: *rolls over in bed*Graystripe? You awake?
Graystripe: *rolls over*yep*licks his cheek*
DARKTIGER
Darkstripe: *rolls over in bed*Tigerclaw you awake?
Tigerclaw: *violently flops over*What in the name of StarClan do you want?
—————-
Leafpaw: guys we should clean the house.
Shrewpaw: right but how do we separate the chores?
Sandstorm: I’ll do the kitchen.
Leafpaw: living room.
Firestar: Bathroom.
Squirrelpaw: Shrewpaw.
Shrewpaw: w-what?
Squirrelpaw: nothing I said I’ll help on the living room.
Note, Shrewpaw was in here just because I needed another character -w-
Note 2, if you have seen this quote and know it’s been changed it’s because it was a bit iffy so I made it appropriate.
———————-
Squirrelflight: hey Leafpool wanna hear something cool?
Leafpool: of course.
Squirrelflight: when a fly is flying in a monster it’s flying as fast as the monster/
Leafpool: I…
*Leafpool.exe has crashed*
—————-
Longtail: hey guys for Halloween we’re going to dress up as things that don’t exist. What will yours be?
Spottedleaf: a mermaid!
Sandstorm: a unicorn!
Darkstripe: my will to live.
——————–
Graystripe: I have a headcanon.
Whitestorm: ah, you have a theory.
Graystripe: no I literally have a headcanon.
Whitestorm: *looking up*i know, we’ve-
Whitestorm:
Whitestorm: it seems that there is a small canon taped to your head.
Graystripe: and it’s fully functional!
Whitestorm: the lengths to which you go to make a pun are admirable but-
Graystripe: WANNA SEE IT GO OFF?
Whitestorm: NOT PARTICULARLY.
——————
SHIP QUOTES
Scourge x Tawnypelt(ew)
Scourge: so I heard you like bad boys.
Tawnypelt: not really.
Scourge: oh thank god.
Graystripe x Fireheart
Graystripe: I LOST FIREHEART! HAVE YOU SEEN HIM?
Person: what does he look like?
Graystripe: *sobbing*BEAUTIFUL!
—————–
Fireheart: all right we’ve got a box we’re going to put something we love in the box.
Graystripe: can I put Cinderpaw in the box?
Fireheart: no
Yellowfang: can I put Cinderpaw in the box?
Fireheart: NO.
Sandstorm: can I-
Fireheart: NO ONE IS PUTTING CINDERPAW IN THE BOX.
—————–
Tigerclaw: love is a weakness and an evolutionary mistake.
Darkstripe: you a literally making a Valentines day card for Goldenflower right now.
Tigerclaw: *pointing hot glue gun threateningly at him*you’re on thin freaking ice
———————
Fireheart: if you kill someone in a living room is it still a living room?
Sandstorm: no, go to sleep
Fireheart: who delivers the mailman’s mail?
Sandstorm: I love you and all, but please go to sleep.
Fireheart: …
Sandstorm: …
Fireheart: if a kid is bad and wants coal what does Santa do?
Sandstorm: if I didn’t love you I’d kill you.
—————-
Scourge: I’m small but knowing
Bone: you wouldn’t even know what the top shelf looks like
Scourge:
Bone:
Scourge: fox heart.
——————
(playing D&D)
Cinderpelt: I roll to steal Fireheart’s…. Heart!
Fireheart: Cinderpelt you can’t-
Cinderpelt: *rolls a twenty*
Fireheart: …
Graystripe, dungeon master: you have a spring wedding. I’m Fireheart’s best man and Sandstorm is Cindepelt’s maid of honor.
—————
Leafpaw: Sandstorm you need to talk to Squirrelpaw. She’s not talking and she says she’s communicating through “interpretive dabbing”
Sandstrom: Squirrelpaw is this true?
Squirrelpaw: *sadly dabs*
————–
Tigerclaw: why is blood so hard to wash off your hands?
Tigerclaw: I JUST REALIZED HOW BAD THAT SOUNDS! I HAD A NOSEBLEED I DIDN’T KILL ANYONE!
Darkstripe: we both know that’s not entirely true.
Brokenstar: hydrogen peroxide dissolves blood just fine.
Mapleshade: do you think if you gave someone a huge shot of hydrogen peroxide straight into their bloodstream it’d kill them?
Ivypaw: this house is filled with murderers.
————–
Berrynose: I’m hungry but my teeth are too clean. Who’d wanna ruin this perfect smile?
Jaypaw: Berrynose you do realize you still have millions of bacteria in your teeth even if they’re “clean”
Berrynose: b-but they’re so shiny
Jaypaw: berrynose I never lie
Berrynose: *sadly eats a mouse*
————-
Darkstripe: *licks Tigerclaw’s cheek*
Tigerclaw: what was that?
Darkstripe: affection
Tigerclaw: it was disgusting.
Tigerclaw:
Darkstripe:
Tigerclaw: do it again
—————–
Spottedleaf: I would do anything for you firepaw
Firepaw: tell me my fur is prettier than yours
Spottedleaf: ……. Almost anything.
——————-
Annnnnd that’s a wrap! I would say I didn’t do too bad with my part two collection. Buuut sadly that was the last of them so the hunt and creativity begin! Again, none of these were by me.
And now a cute little quote I found.
For once in my life, I don’t have to try to be happy. When I’m with you it just happens.

Hi peoplez! It’s spring break for our school district, and I’m in Ohio! My oldest cousin had a baby in January, and so my family and I went here.