The Hazelpage

The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.

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Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.

Notice Board:

- The opening hours of the tavern have been extended! Thanks to new staff hirings, we are happy to serve guests 24 hours a day! We hope you'll warmly welcome our new barstaff: Pearl the Purple Microkitten and Lucy the Alarmingly Long Lemur!
- Be sure to check out our new vegan options, including a Tofu and Seaweed Fish and Chips; a Beetroot and Bean Burger with Pineapple and Chilli Salsa; and Nachos Topped with Chili, Zesty Guacamole and Five-Tomato Salsa!
- We are now a proud supplier of beverages from the Lua Luau Lemonade Company! As such, we will now be serving the highly popular flavours of C++ Cherryade, Java Julmust and CSS Cola! All from an introductory price of 12px (Pixels) each!
- And for people looking out for something to do in the tavern, we have several new board games on offer in the gaming cupboard! Be sure to have a go at Pixel Perfect, the game where players try to write their messages in rhyme! We assure you it's a heck of a good time!

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  • The scent of death flits off a shady figure to the right. Rockpelt, who orders some Cola and investigates.

    • “Oh! Is this some sort of murder mystery?? If so, then I’m in!!” Shimmer shouts, grabbing popcorn out of thin air and sitting on a couch made of any snack you could ever think of. “So I don’t have to get up for snacks!” Shimmer explains, even though no-one needed an explination.

      • springkit eyes the couch hungrily and decides the couch needs more bombay potato crackers. She snaps her fingers, and 4 bags of potato crackers appears next to her.

    • “Ohhh finally something interesting is happening that I can watch!” Silvy plonked down on a bright yellow beanbag and opened a bag of cookies.

    • “Well well, finally something intresting.” Ember sits down on the couch and starts nibbling on the enchiladas that she stole from Viper. “Is it murder? Oh those are fun to watch!” Purrs menacing and steals a bag of chips from the nearest cat.

  • “Heyyyyyyyy!” Shimmers cried happily. “It’s a new page!” She bounced over to the counter, where all kinds of food were laid out. She scanned the cards with the ingredients until she spotted a vegetarian one with stuff she’d actually eat.
    Shimmers glanced side to side and grabbed some food off the tray. “Yum!” she purred, taking a bite.

    • Twilightpaw bounded in and headed over to the counter to grab some chocolate, then joined Shimmers. “Want some?” Twilightpaw offered a chocolate bar to Shimmers. “For your dessert.” Twilightpaw then stared down at the chocolate, as if realizing something. “Oh yeah, we’re cats… is chocolate poisonous to cats? I know it’s to dogs. But who knows? Crazy and unexpected stuff happen on the Hazel page, on the previous page, I saw a cat asking for gum.” She gazed wistfully at her chocolate. “I love chocolate…”

    • Emberpaw grabs some popcorn and then purrs as she listens to everyone talk about chocolate. “We aren’t DOGS. I think we will live. I mean we do eat raw mouse on a daily basis, do we not?” Walks over to the couch and starts eating her popcorn which happens to be shapeshifting into 20 different things.

    • “N-no, I don’t think so… should I be worried about this???” Shimmer replied, instinctively grabbing a shield. From where, no one knows.

      • Springkit, from her position behind Shimmerpaw´s shield, pokes her head out ¨Nope they got buried in the last page. No more burning.¨ and discreetly kicks a flamethrower into a random black hole she summoned.

        • “But what if Peck followed us onto this page??” Shimmer asked glancing around and wondering how Springkit got behind her shield…

          • Springkit, knowing what shimmer was thinking replied cheerfully, ¨Oh I use my small size and creeped behind you to in front of you behind your shield. No one noticed, since I´m still the size of a kitten.¨

        • “Oh, thank StarClan, no more fire,” Sparkpaw mewed, quickly backing away from Springkit’s black hole.

          • Springkit, remembering this was in the middle of the Hazelpage, quickly closes the black hole. ¨There, it´s safe now!¨

    • “I AM GOING TO SET EVERYTHING ON FIRE! NOTHING IS SAFE ANYMORE!!!” Ember trots over to the cupcake table an throws one at the nearest creature. “Springkit threw that!!” She leaps away, casting them all an evil smile as chaos eruputed.
      >:3

      • Springkit gasps at the pure audacity of doing that, and she screeches ¨ IT WAS NOT ME! IT WAS EMBER! AND IF YOU DO NOT BELIEVE ME I WILL SCREECH UNTIL YOUR EARS BLEED¨

        • Ember chuckles and slumps into the couch, loving the drama as Springkit starts to screech

  • Turtle sits down in a pink bean bag. They put mair earbuds in, and start listening to Satisfied from Hamilton. Xe can’t resist humming along.
    “Does anybody else like this song?” ot asks. “It’s one of my favorite Hamilton songs!”
    MothPool Shipper

      • “Ummm…” Shimmers said, tearing her gaze from the TV, where Hamilton was playing. “It’s a Broadway musical! It’s also on Disney+!” She flicked her tail at the screen.

      • Turtle explains, “It’s a musical written by Lin-Manuel Miranda about Alexander Hamilton. I used to hate it, but my family convinced me to watch it again, and I really liked it this time! It’s on Disney plus.”
        MothPool Shipper

  • Shimmers flopped on the carpet in front of the fireplace. “I’m so BORED!” she said, rolling over to let the heat spread evenly over her pelt. “Does anyone have any ideas for what to do?”

    • “Read?” Sparkpaw suggests. “Code? Write something? Draw? Play an instrument, if you play one? Sing? Do math? There’s also Pixel Perfect, but I have no idea how it works.”

      • “Hmm…,” Shimmers mewed thoughtfully. “Yes, I shall play my flute!” She made one of her flutes appear. It was labeled “Shimmy”.
        Shimmers got a few strange looks from other cats sitting nearby. “My friends saw some of the possible nicknames for me on here,” she explained. “I told them that I didn’t want to be called ‘Shimmy’ and they took that and had me name one of my flutes that…”

    • “Maybe we shouldn’t have any sort of chaos on this page?” Silvy suggested, yawning, “We could sit on the couch, eat cookies, drink sodas, watch youtube and take a short break.”

      • ¨that sounds lovely¨ springkit sighs. ¨Only I´m not sure if the others will cooperate.¨

        • “Well it’s only for this page,” Silvy mewed, “So I don’t think anyone would mind. We can go back to doing the usual stuff the next page.”

      • “Hmmmm, that doesn’t seem like something I’d normally consider…” Rose flipped his newly cut hair, fingernails tip-tapping on the counter as ey thought this through. “Oh well! Might as well give it a shot!”

        Leaning back, ey threw a shout to the mods, “Might I get a soda? I promise, I have ‘real money’ or whatever i is you’re taking.” Xe smiled wide, teeth glinting in the candelight.

    • Ember purrs and trots over. “If your so close to the fire, go ahead and light your pelt on fire,” Emberpaw mews evilily. Ember holds her cup of soda close and said, sorta-dreamily, “Chaos would be quite nice for a change.”

      • “HOW DARE YOU!” Shimmers roared. “THOU SHALT NOT THROW FOOD AT MY HEAD!” She clapped her paws menacingly and all of the food Leopardkit just threw whipped around and went back at Leopardkit. Shimmers quickly used her magic to create a shield around herself so that Leopardkit couldn’t retaliate.

  • Avatar 🐅🌟Tigerpaw/shine (Tiger Dashing Under Shining Sun/Tiger Shine/Tiger) (mae/mim/mair/mairself, rav/rae/raven/ravenself, she/her/her/herself)🐅🌟 says:

    “Hi! I have a scavenger hunt! And here is the 5th clue!” shouts Tiger, holding up a piece of paper that reads: “Firey Wings!”

  • Shimmer looks around. “I think that we should go to Mars!” She shouts. “Who’s with me?!”

    • “Sorry, maybe next page?” Silvy mewed, “I’m too stuffed with cookies to do anything.” Silvy slowly closed her eyes as she leaned back into her beanbag.

    • “No!” Shimmers cried from where she was flopped in front of the fire. “As I have said before, Going to space changes the shape of your heart and stretches you out! No THANK YOU!”
      Shimmers paused to think and then added, “And this is a page of relaxation! We decided on it!”

      • “NOPE!” Shimmers roared shoving Hawkwhisker into a gigantic box with holes in the sides that was labeled “No world destruction allowed here! (It’s literally not possible.)”
        “There!” Shimmers mewed triumphantly. “If any part of you is in that box, your powers of destruction won’t work!” Then, she put some cupcakes, cookies, and layer sodas in the box along with a large stack of Warriors books so Hawkwhisker had something to do.
        “You may come back out if you swear to not destroy the world! And that you won’t cause chaos for this page!” she mewed, flopping onto a teal beanbag next to Silvy’s.

        • “You can’t stuff me into a box!” Ember hisses, smiling. She leaps onto the biggest beanbag and screams “Time to rule the world and go to mars!!!”

          • “ARGGGG!!!” Shimmers cried. “This was supposed to be a chaos-free page!” She then dragged Ember off of the beanbag (which happened to be the teal one that Shimmers had been sitting on) and put her in the box.

            • “Not anymore!!” Emberpaw leaped up, did a twisty thingy and the box went soring on top of Shimmers. “AHA! I can’t be held captive!” Ember hisses eviliy, then grabs a random flamethrower and blasts some peeps. She leaps away and into her new Tesla, in which she starts her jornery to mars! (And no, she can not speed in here, the speed limit is 1 so this might take awhile.)

              • Shimmers clapped her paws again and the singed cats stopped being singed. “You go ahead to Mars, you won’t make it at the rate you’re going anyway!” she said.

    • springkit, dismayed, looks around because SHE KNOWS THIS WILL CAUSE CHAOS and this page was supposed to be a relaxing vacation

      • Swirly stood back and watched the chaos, eating some suspicious mozzarella and drinking a liquid that emitted a strange glow. “Man, gotta love the Viperdiner” she mewed.

      • “Oh well, too late now!” Shimmers mewed while stopping yet another of Hawkwhisker’s world domination plots.

    • Ember claps her paws and suddenly volcano’s start erupting from inside. “Yay! Lava!” Ember hisses cheerfully, letting world domiantion begin

  • a sleepy opalkit limps into the door, and falls asleep on the fluffest couch by the fire

    • “Oh YAY!” Shimmers cried, bouncing over. “A new person! Come, come!” She lead Creekkit over to a table full of rainbow cookies, cupcakes, and layer sodas for her to try. “We LOVE new people! The more people here, the more chaos! The more chaos, the more fun!”

      • creekkit opens mouth and monches a bit from every one of the cackes then falls asleep and dreams of chaos and rainbow unicorns

    • springkit, half conscious on a arrangement of blankets on the carpet before the fire, lazily lifts a hand. ¨hi, this is the hazelpage, usually there´s a lot more chaos but everyone agreed to have a vacation and be calm.¨

      • “Not everyone.” Ember grumbled, flicking her tail lazily from her place in front of the fire, where her red and back fur shone beautifly.

        • “Yeah. I didn’t say no chaos!” Leopardkit says, while throwing a hamburger at Springkit’s face.

    • “Hello hello! Welcome to the Hazelpage, the home of chaos,” Silvy mewed from her beanbag, “There’s all sorts of new chaos every new page and lots of foods especially porble cookies and cupcakes!”
      Silvy yawned, “This is the first ever relaxing page on the Hazelpage, so there’s not as much explosions and stuff going on.”
      Silvy rolled over on her beanbag to face Creekkit. “I may look very lazy at the moment, but I assure you, next page I’m going to be creating all sorts of chaos in no time and keep Shimmers busy.”

      • Shimmers sighed, sounding resigned. “Yes, you are…,” she mewed, eating another cupcake. “Then again, what would the Hazelpage be without chaos?”

    • “Well actually, I think there’s a little more chaos than usual from the cats who don’t want to relax, but feel free to just relax.

    • “What is this McFlurryClan?” Twilightpaw murmured, sipping her milk tea. She stared sleepily at Daydream and Shimmers, then realized what was happening. She jumped up. “Uh… is this normal, or should I save Shimmers?” She pointed a paw at Daydream who was holding Shimmers hostage.