The Hug Page

Hi guys i have horrible news about lionstripe: (sadly and quietly)i think that i like him. I mean like he was really nice and made me happy but the problem is i haven’t seen him in a year and idk if he even remmembers me or not, i’ve been searching up “how to get rid of a crush” but nothing works. OF ALL PEOPLE IT HAD TO BE HIM?! And i just can’t stop thinking about him, and i dont wanna tell my mom, and my older sister gives bad advice so i didn’t tell her either. I haven’t called my best friends in a long time, my other friend well we text each other a lot but like i dont feel comfortable telling her, and my other friend that i want her advice she IS TOO BUSY! And I never realized how much i missed him. And i just feel like i can’t tell anyone about it. And i feel so lonely, like i can’t talk to anyone about my problems. I litteraly almost start crying when i remmember that he might not remember me and i might never see him again. I know it’s stupid but i need advice.

Part Two

So, me, Diamondpaw, and two other students I’ll call Beechpaw and Duskpaw were working on a project together.

When we presented the project, it would involve talking to other students about it. Like, students’ projects would be around the room, and students could walk up to other students’ projects and learn about them.

Beechpaw was explaining that he was nervous, because he was an introvert, and talking to people he didn’t know well made him stressed out.

Diamondpaw was reassuring him. I think she said something like, “It’s okay. I’m an introvert, too.”

(BTW, I’m not sure where Duskpaw was during this.)

I said I was also an introvert.

But then Diamondpaw said something… well, kinda rude.

“You need to talk a lot less to be an introvert.”

Being an introvert isn’t about how much you talk. This is a common belief, but it isn’t true.

Being an introvert simply means that you ‘charge your batteries’ by spending time alone. Extroverts ‘charge their batteries’ by being around others.

Being introverted doesn’t necessarily mean you are shy. Being introverted doesn’t even necessarily mean you’re quiet- it’s certainly the case for lots of introverts, but not necessarily all.

I’m an introvert, but I’m a more talkative introvert.

So it hurt my feelings that Diamondpaw made it sound like I wasn’t really an introvert.

I don’t remember what I said in reply to her comment, but I doubt it was something useful.

I’m gonna continue talking about Diamondpaw now.

I feel like Diamondpaw was one of the less bad influencer friends of mine. She was actually pretty nice, and at point, she told me that I was probably her best friend at charter school.

We talked about things that we didn’t talk about with other friends- personal topics like puberty and growing up.

Non-Stop

Part Four

I wish I’d been strong enough to leave the way Evergreenpaw was.

But I didn’t.

I stayed with the friend group even though they weren’t the best influence.

I stayed even though I felt like I had to pretend to be somebody I wasn’t.

I stayed even though I felt like I had to hide the fact that I’m an atheist.

I stayed even though, extremely deep down, I thought that maybe there were other people could be friends with.

I went to charter school for two semesters, and I hardly got to know anybody outside my friend group, all because I felt like if I didn’t have them, I wouldn’t have friends at all.

Part Four

I don’t keep in touch with Jasminepaw, Tigerpaw, Ashpaw, Evergreenpaw, or Diamondpaw- only Adderpaw, a girl I met in the second semester.

But now, even though my charter school experience was over two years ago, I’m seriously realizing all of this: That my friends might not have been my friends after all.

It would really help me if you could give me advice. I have these questions:

1. From what I described, do you think my friends were truly mean at times per se?

2. Jasminepaw. Just… just tell me if you think she was a good friend or not.

3. I think that’s everything. Tysm for reading all of this.

Non-Stop