BlogClan Tavern, Triple Trouble

Scientific jokes:
Don’t worry I only tell scientific jokes periodically. 😏😉

Why did the bear dissolve in water?
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It was polar. XD

Two atoms are having a conversation. The first one says, “I’ve lost an electron!” and the second replies, “Are you positive?”

Did you know that there is a species of antelope capable of jumping higher than the average house?
This is due to its powerful hindlegs and the fact that the average house cannot jump. 😛

An infectious disease enters a bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve your kind in here.” It replies, “Well, you’re not a very good host.”

A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a beer. The bartender replies, “For you, no charge.”

What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
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You may have graduated but I’ve got many degrees.

Biology – The only science where multiplication and division mean the same thing. 😜😉

This is the scientific way of saying a bad word (better than the real way):
You disagree with my hypothesis?
Well fluorine uranium carbon potassium you!
Yeah I know it’s bad. But it gets your anger out in long words, lol. But you can always just say foxdung if it gets too long. 😛 Sorry, I know it’s bad.

A science teacher is teaching his class, “……Along with “Antimatter” and “Dark Matter” we’ve recently discovered the existence of “Doesn’t Matter,” which appears to have no effect on the universe whatsoever…..”

What did the scientist say when someone he didn’t like asked him out?
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Sodium hypobromite (the chemical formula for this is “NaBrO!”)

Lasers were once a huge scientific breakthrough; now we use them to play with cats.
Computers were once a huge scientific breakthrough; now we use them to look at cats.
Conclusion: Science was made for cats.

The laws of physics (and possibly other scientific stuff) are the only laws you can break without being thrown in jail and instead you get a nobel prize. 😛

What kind of fish is made of only two sodium atoms?
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2 Na! 🐟🐟

Serotonin and Dopamine- Techinally the only two things you enjoy 😛🙂

A scientist says to a woman/man, “Are you made up of copper and tellurium? Because you are Cu Te!”

What do you do with a sick chemist?
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If you can’t helium and you can’t curium them you might as well barium.

What three elements are most popular on Tuesday?
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Tantalum, Carbon, and Osmium – chemical formula for that is “Ta C Os” 😜🌮

Um (number 121; mass 298.17) – the element of confusion
Aw (number 552) – the element of cuteness
Ha (number 28) – the element of humor
Ah! (number 123; mass 230) – the element of surprise

Hey, wanna hear joke about nitric oxide?
NO
Oxygen and Magnesium together?
OMg 🙄😂

Argon walks into a bar and the bartender yells at him to get out. Argon doesn’t react.

Fun fact: Cats are composed of iron, lithium, and neon – FeLiNe!

Once I told a chemistry joke.
There was no reaction. 😝

TeAcHEr definition – A good conductor of energy (Te #52 – tellurium); its processes cannot be studied without the required level of accuracy (Ac #89 – actinium); it can react spontaneously and is explosive when concentrated (H #1 – hydrogen); is slightly soft but also firm and radiates light (Er #68 – Erbium) 😛

If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
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H2O cubed!

Why did Chlorine’s sisters, Boron and Carbon, lock her in the closet?
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Because she was too attractive.

Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about Helium?
He just couldn’t put it down. 😛

Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen?
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They bonded well from the minute they met.

Are you full of beryllium, gold, and titanium?
Because you are Be-Au-Ti-Full.

When you’re really literal:
“Love is in the air.”
“No! You’re wrong. Nitrogen, oxygen, and carbon dioxide are in the air! Don’t you know anything about science?”

Why is coco(a) bad for you?
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In a mathematical and scientific way, it is bad because “CO” squared = “co x co” which in abbreviation = co sq. (2) aka “coco” = CO2 = carbon dioxide = square that and you will surely die and for some people math sucks so this will all just be a confusing jumble of letters and numbers and we will all die of boredom and confusion. 😛 I literally just made that up, haha.
Sorry that was so lame. Let me know if you understood it, lol.