The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.
[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]
Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.
Notice Board: Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.
Creations lays on the ground in a calico onesie, as their Mapleshade costume.
“Haha, c h e e s e.”
“COTTAGE CHEESE IS BETTER!” screams Willa, showing up out of the blue with a pop and a flash of blue.
“COTTAGEE CHEESE IS VERY GOOD” yells dino in agreement but still sets the dinosaurs onto willa anyway because he’s just having too much fun destroying property and watching people get eaten
“HEY GUYS, WE GOTS TO REVIVE THIS PAGE!”
“HEY, I KNOW! LET’S HAVE A WAR!”
“DOGS ARE BETTER THAN CATS, YOU CAN NEVER CHANGE MY MIND!”
“DINOSAURS ARE BETTER” yells dino as he summons a horde of battle dinosaurs to eat everyone with a different opinion
TURTLES ARE BETTER
ARMY OF TURTLES INTIMIDATINGLY STARE AT U
whilst the turtles are distracted staring at willa, dino jumps out behind them riding a stegosaurus and shoots lasers at everyone
“Watch out! You’ll burn this whole place down!” Willa screams, dodging the lasers. “Let me help!”
She quickly searches though her bag and finds her Book of Witchcraft. “Summoning demons… let’s see… which page was that…” she mumbles, leafing through the pages. “Aha! Fire demons!”
“Arsonis balaze, arsonis balistre!
Scrocth unto, scorch garistre!” She reads from the book. She repeats it three times, spinning in a circle.
*Spot of ground turns to water underneath you*
“WELL DOLPHINS ARE BETTER THAN ALL THOSE ANIMALS COMBINED, JUST WATCH!” Willa screams, as dolphins leap out of the water, Drizz desperately clinging to one’s back.
dino laughs maniacally as he pours oil onto the water. the fire demons quickly spread to cover the surface. creation’s flamethrower quickly becomes irrelevant as the entire place is now on fire.
the animals all run through the walls, smashing massive holes in the tavern.
“we should probably do something,” says dino
“Yes,” agrees Willa. “WE SHOULD CREATE MORE CHAOS!! Although if my slushie keeps melting because of the heat, maybe I will freeze this place.”
“i wonder what frozen flames look like,” says dino
“or even better, what they taste like.”
“NO! DON’T. YOU. DARE.”
Creations proceeds to grab a flamethrower.
“DOGS!
ARE!
FRIENDLY!
AND !
NICE!
AND!
THEY!
ACTUALLY!
PLAY!
WITH!
YOU!
AND!
LOVE!
YOU!
AND!
CARE!
ABOUT!
YOU!
AND!
PROTECT!
YOU!
AND!
CATS!
DO!
NONE!
OF!
THAT!”
“THERE, I SAID IT! GONNA ARGUE WITH ME??” Willa asks, pointing to her Book of Witchcraft.
“all the dinosaurs are gone,” cries dino, “how can I force them all to agree with me now?” tears drip down his face. little explosions spark at dino’s feet as he weeps. you’d think the tears would stop the fire, but because it’s an electrical fire, they just make it worse.
Willa feels bad for Dino and summons a flock of pterodactyls.
dino is once again happy
CHEETAHS ARE OBVIOUSLY THE BEST!!!!!
“cheetahs are just really big cats who like breaking the speed limit.” dino points out.
Yes, and what’s wrong with that?
“nothing”, says dino, “i respect the disregard for road safety.”
“YOU ARE WRONG!! CATS ARE 10000000x BETTER!!!”
*Throws a teleporter that summons some cats*
“i’m surprised that despite this website being centred around cats, you are the first to mention cats.” says dino. “but it doesn’t matter, because dinosaurs are better. if only they’d come back and quit being cowards.”
“Well, at least dolphins never left us in the first place.”
*Sky awkwardly sneaks in and sits in a corner*
“Hey. Come join our battle on which animal is the best,” Willa says gently, appearing by Sky’s side. Willa is also over there, still fighting in the battle with her fire demons and dolphins. She is in two places at once. …What? How the heck?? “It’s the Witchcraft Book,” Willa informs the confused narrator. Ah, thanks. You know you sound crazy, right? “No I don’t,” says Willa incorrectly with a puzzled frown. Yes you do. No one can hear me except you and the other narrators. “Ohh,” Willa sighs. “That’s okay. They thought I was crazy a long time ago.” Who are you talking to? “You, idiot! Narrator!” I’m going to ignore that, and also end this comment, it’s getting a little long, haha. “Don’t you dare–“
Primrosepaw summons waffles, and forces the current leaders of all clans (and Firestar mwhahahah) to eat 1,0000,0000 dry waffles
But–but–but– FIRESTAR DOESN’T LIKE WAFFLES!
DOESN’T MATTER >:)
Primrosepaw enters the room, confused
Stormflame walks in and sits at a table.
“I haven’t been here in forever. Can I have an apple juice please?”
She starts fidgeting with her rings
Primrosepaw begins throwing dry waffles at everyone while spinning rapidly in a T-pose
“i strongly dislike this.” says dino, dodging waffles.
PANCAKES FOREVER!
Moon screams as she flings pancakes at all the dinosaurs and turtles and dolphins and then summons all the best dogs in the universe
DOGS AND PANCAKES FOREVER She screams before wondering why she is talking in the third person
dino likes pancakes so he stops trying to stop the dinosaurs from running away and eats some maple syrup-drenched pancakes
“We all talk in third person here,” Willa informs Moon. “It’s a thing. AND ALSO YESSSSSSS DOGS FOREVER! But don’t hurt my dolphins!”
“DOLPHINS TASTE GOOD WHAT DO YOU MEAN?”🤨
“NO, LEMONS AND LEMONCAKE ARE THE BEST!” Silverkit screechs. (BlogChat joke) (OR IS IT!)
“NOOO! ORANGES ARE SUPERIOR!!!!!!!!!!!!” Primrosepaw screeches back
“Actually orange’s are nice” Silverkit says calmly, before sitting down at the bar and ordering Orange cake.
Primrosepaw begins going on an orange juicing spree using up all the oranges
Moonpaw and Blacky steal the orange juice and bring it back to Stormy who proudly pats their heads as they split the orange juice.
“They probably taste delicious,” Willa responds to Dino. She goes over to the bar and orders an ice machine/lazer and a popsicle maker. She sprays the frozen air at the fire and the demons and watches with amusement as the fire freezes. She breaks off one freezing-hot tongue of frozen flame and sticks it in her mouth. “Mmm,” she says in an emotionless, observing tone. “It makes my mouth feel like it’s dying.”
“yes, my tastebuds do not know what they are supposed to be tasting. delectable.” dino says in his best snooty food critic voice.