The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.
[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]
Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.
Notice Board: Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.
“Guysguysguysguysgguysguysguysguys,” Hollykit announced on a table. “I feel like the spirituality of the Hazelpage is diminishing. That is why I’m starting a program to bring back the chaos. Just… I don’t know, throw around dishes and plates and maybe have some arguments on whether it’s gray or gray, although I’d recommend not doing that. It’s spelled gray.” She then dipped her head and leaped off the table with a lightsaber in her hands.
“Akshually,” Blazey says snobbishly, adjusting his nonexistent glasses, “It’s spelled graeh.” He then runs away to avoid the coming flood of vegetables about to be thrown at him.
“NO” Pheonix Flamedtornado/Flamedove in a poofy pink dress says. “IT’s GRAEHHHHH”
“No” says Pearlflower, while perfecting and floofing out her tail, “It’s actually spelled GRERAHEEAHEAHYYYYYY”
“I now begin the great revolution of Greay! Everyone who spells it as ‘grey’, say ‘Ay!’ I will lead you to victory! Gray shall be no more!” Shadedpaw summons a microphone and yells into it, getting several glares as the microphone topples and makes a loud noise.
“NOOOOOO” Flamedove screeches, becoming Flamedtornado
What is this magical place :O
Waltzing towards Hopi, Blazey grins at her while ducking to avoid a peanut. “Why, only the best place on Blogclan!”
Wow! let me see the menu…
*Looks at the menu*
You still got some of that C++ Cherryade? Looks good.
*Eyes pile of thrown peanuts in the floor*
Um… (⑉⊙ȏ⊙)
Marblerose sees the pile of peanuts and begins to praise them.
Leafbirch enters, saying, “I WANT SOME SPRITE PLEASE” and then wacks someone with a lightsaber sword and a oricalcum shield.
Flamedove rushes over: “THE SPRITE IS THIS WAY”
Harpy Wynn leaps into the tavern, her wings spread wide. “Guess who’s back!” She shouts and creates Darth Maul’s lightsaber out of thin air, grinning like a maniac.
“Oh no! They have the high ground!” Blazey looks around to see who else got that reference before summoning a blue lightsaber.
“You underestimate my power!” Harpy Wynn shouts and backflips in the air before… you know 😉
“NO YOU DON’T!!!!!” Leafbirch says, wacking Harpy Wynn with her lightsaver sword and oricalchum sheild, and using her psychic powers to lift everyone up and taking away all their weapons. “I AM THE RULER OF THE HAZELPAGE NOW!!” She yells, and then wacks Marblerose.
Leafbirch then summons a Harry Potter wand, and starts yelling enchantments. “Cruicio!” She yells at Marblerose, Hollykit, and Bunnyfreckle. They immediately start yelling in pain, and then Leafbirch yells, “Imperio!” At Harpy Wynn, Flamedove, Shadedpaw, and Blazestrike, who obey her commands now, and then Leafbirch says, “THERE IS NO MORE PEANUT WORSHIPING CULT ANYMORE I AM THE RULER HERE!!!!!!” And uses her psychic powers to block the door, and make floods of veggies appear out of nowhere and hurls them towards everyone.
Marblerose screams, but then remembers that the peanut worshipping cult cannot be destoryed. She then starts praying for the peanuts, then her army of peanuts gets summoned. “PEANUTS! ATTACK!” she yells, and the army of peanuts attack Leafbirch while Marblerose shapeshifts into a peregrine falcon and flies away from the scene.
Flamedtorando backs Marblerose up and screeches: “PEANUTSSSSS”
Before the spell hits Hollykit, she zaps it with her gleaming lightsaber. “OH NO YOU DON’T,” she announces before throwing a handful of peanuts at Leafbirch.
“Magic?” Harpy Wynn scratches her ears. She snaps her fingers to levitate Leafbirch, yawning. “Why use magic when we use the Force?”
Roselet runs away from the Hazelpage quickly after coming back after 575765766757 days to check on it. “NOOOOO NOT PEANUTS!!!” she protests very very very loudly.
I will spare you if you like Pokemon
*gets wand ready*
“I LOVE POKEMON,” Roselet yells, backing away slowly.
eggpwa enters and is very confused, but he goes on to quietly sit in the corner and create piranha solution anyway
Flamepaw finally decides to show up at the Hazelpage, grabs a Sprite even though she’s not allowed to have soda, and starts reading naughty books with even gorier deaths than Warriors, grinning the whole time. “Who’d like to read some naughty books with me?! *naughty boi laughs* NAUGHTY BOI LIFE IS THE BESTT!!!!!” Flamepaw then proceeds to grab a giant throne that appeared out of knowhere, declaring herself the new ruler of the Hazelpage. “MUAHAHA NOW LET’S SET SOME STUFF ON FIRE!! WHILE STILL READING THE NAUGHTY BOOKS!! WHO’S WITH ME?!?!?!” >:D
Hatchet stumbles into the Hazelpage sleepiky.
“Guess who’s come back to this place?!” He said with a huge yawn.
“Hatchet the Jokeinator is here! Jokes later. Now, sleep.” Hatchet collapses into a chair and falls asleep. He knows what will happen and if it doesn’t happen he will be disappointed in The Hazelpage.
“What in the world is going on?!” Spiritflight exclaims, entering the Hazelpage with a shocked expression on her face. “Nevermind that,” I snort, shaking my head. “Who wants peanuts?” I shake the bag roughly, a small grin appearing across my face, my eyes bright with mischief.
*MODS COME HERE NOW*
WHY THE HECK IS THAT MY USER?!! WHAT IS GOING ON-
ITS SUPPOSE TO BE
§~Spiritstar/Spiritflight/Spirit~§~LightningClan~§~#catsforever~§~Emoji Lord~§~I Got No Account Cuz You’ll Steal My Donuts~§~Yes, I’m Active 100%~§~♡Aquila Is AWSOME♡~§
Did you enter the wrong thing into the name field if you’re logged out?
Shadedpaw summons a microphone again and clears their throat. “Ahem- I have an announcement to everyone here. You are in a very realistic dream, and it is time to wake up.” Then they slowly start to fade until they disappear into the air.
“NOOOOOO” Flamedove screeches! “PEANUTS WILL DOMINATE”
“That can’t be possible.” Hollykit’s eyes widen. “That means… my life is a lie!”
Now
* uses psychic powers to stop Spiritflight and makes peanut bag disappear, then yelled “Imperio” at Roselet and Spiritflight, then told them, “YOU ARE NOW PART OF MY WORSHIPING CULT, THE ALPHA POKEMON ARCEUS!!!!!! WE SHALL NOW WORSHIP ONLY ARCEUS !!!!! MWUHAHA”
Flakepaw wakes with a start and looks right at leafpaw. He gasps
“You used one of the unforgivable curses! You dare!” He then pauses and clears his throat, “Joke of the day is back! Todays joke is. . . What does a cow use to mow the lawn? A lawn-moo-er!” He then turns back to Leafpaw and takes out his wand.
Harpy Wynn wheezes like a tea kettle.
Flamepaw pops into existence, carrying a giant stack of books and a Harry Potter wand. “Er, what if I don’t play Pokémon? Also, you know the Imperius curse is against Wizarding law, right? It’s stated multiple times in the books.” She grins nervously, embarrassed. “Also, I’ve started Barney’s Tax Fraud Squad, a cult where we commit arson and tax fraud and read naughty books with violence. Uh, do you want to join?” She asks nervously. “We have cookies.”
WHO CARES THIS ISN’T HARRY POTTER
“I only worship Giratina and Chaos!” Harpy Wynn shouts, creating Riptide. “Also, Percy Jackson is better than Harry Potter!”
Fogpaw summons bunch of skeletons to appear and yelled my agreement