The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.
[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]
Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.
Notice Board: Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.
Continuing Flameggy’s trend, Cherrypaw shouts (continuing along the Encanto theme):
“I CAN’T MOVE RATS
AND I CAN’T MAKE RATS AND RATS BLOOM
I CAN’T CONTROL THE MORNING RAT OR A HURRICANE
AND I’M TIRED OF RATTING ON A MIRACLE
A MIRACLE!”
She is pretty sure those aren’t the lyrics, but shrugs and scampers away to pursue Shoes.
Shoes hopes that the shoes Cherrypaw wants to pursue are the kind that go down below on your feet
But from the tone of Cherrypaw’s tune she assumes that’s not true, so she wonders what kind of shenanigans will ensue
(P.S. Read like a rap 👀)
“AHA!” roared Cherrypaw, popping up and tying Shoes with her own laces.
TYING SHOES WITH HER OWN LACES
Flamilton starts dancing around in a Bruno costume with an army of rats. “HOORAY!!!!!!!!”
Sil casually padded in,
casuallybroke her eardrums, andcasuallymended them again 😛“hEY KiDS!” Flamilton yells, throwing crayons at everyone. “WelCOMe BaCK tO thE WonDERfUl sHoW’S eMPorIUm-PalOOzA ExTRAVaGaNZa HoUR–FoR kiDS!!!” She proceeds to reference multiple other videos that no one seems to get.
“…You’re insane.” Ripplepaw pauses her music, and the tavern earthquake finally stopped. “AND I LIKE THAT!” Ripplepaw proceeds to turn the volume up to higher than full, and the tavern starts flying off the ground.
Shimmz goes flying out the window.
“BYEEE!” Ripplepaw calls after Shimmz.
“HOOrAY!” Flamilton yells, now trying to make swords out of the crayons.
“Here!” Ripplepaw passes a pre-made netherite sword, enchanted with fire aspect II. “It does arson too!”
Hapry Wynn catches some of the crayons midair and starts to crunch on them. “Scrumptious,” she says, while her stomach slowly starts to stop functioning.
“The green ones are my personal favorites,” Flamilton nods solemnly.
‘You’re both wrong!’ Nettlepaw appears suddenly, shaking her head. ‘The red ones are obviously the best!’ She takes a red crayon out of her pocket and starts sucking on it absent-mindedly.
“I RECOGNISE THAT SONG!” Tinyfrost, making her first appearance on the Hazelpage just for this, changes into a red crayon suit. “Hello kids, i’m the colour red, and i brought my friends to teach you ’bout them!”
Flamilton gasps, overjoyed that someone else has experienced the beauty of the Crayon Song. “THEY’RE THE COLORS OF ALL THE THINGS YOU SEE, AND RED IS ME, THE COLOR OF AWESOME THINGS! LIKE HEARTS, AND ROSES, AND MARS, BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY…” she pauses (for dramatic effect, of course). “BlOoD bLOoD BlOOd BlOoD BLoOD!!”
“HI I’M ORANGE LIKE MAC ‘N CHEESE, LET’S NAME OTHER ORANGE THINGS NOW IF YOU PLEASE”
Foampaw started to break out into song as if on instinct.
“WE GOT PUMPKINS, AND TIGERS, AND THE DESERT SAND pRiCrIpTiOn BoTtLeS ARE YOU ORANGE FRIENDS! LALALALALALA, CHEESE! HOORAY!”
Ignoring the traditional lyrics, Flamilton begins to yell “JAUNdICE!” and “lIVER FaiLUrE!” while running amok through the Hazelpage in a yellow crayon costume.
“How does that somehow feel familiar,” Koi sighs. “Heh… heh…”
Foampaw jumps on a table, grabbing the nearest boombox and plays ‘Loser, Baby’ in the background at full volume. “MY TRANSFORMATION IS COMPLETE! PFP AND ALL! HUSKERDUST FOREVER!” He screams at the top of his lungs for no particular reason or purpose.
Edit: Whoopsies new page
“HII SORRY” Koi yowls. “I HAVE YET TO WATCH EPISODE 2!! BUT OKAY!!” Koi rushes off to the newly installed Movie Room and binge-watches Hazbin
“YESSSS! JOIN THE CHAOS! IF YOU’RE OLD ENOUGH, OF COURSE! (But for real stay safe! I don’t want any kits going to watch this show >:[ And please be extra careful around episode 4!!)”
“Guys, the tavern’s jumping. I think it’s my music.” Ripplepaw looks worried, but just for a second. “COOL! LET’S TURN IT HIGHER!”
“Yesssss!” Harpy Wynn shouts, and turns on You’ll Be Back. “You sayyyyy, the price of my love’s not a price that you’re willing to payyyy,” she yells as she vibes to the music, making the tavern jump more.
“You cryyyyyy in your tea which you hurl in the sea when you see my go by”
Flamilton gasps, holding back tears of pride and joy knowing that more people are becoming
her mindless Hamilton-obsessed followersHamilfans. She jumps onto a table, fully decked out in a King George III outfit and belts out, “WhY sO SaD? ReMEmBEr, wE mADe aN aRraNGemENT whEn yOu WenT awAY, now you’re making me maaaaa-aaaaa-ad!” She pauses, smiling wickedly. “Now, remember, despite our estrangement, I’m your maaaaaaaaaan…”Vixenpaw starts happily bawling on the ground as she realizes one of her favorite songs is playing.
“YEAH!!!” Icemeadow, the Blog’s #1 Jumping Enthusiast, shouts. He then proceeds to blare his own music, which is hooked up to two large speakers. Realizing this could hurt somebody’s ears, he casts a magical spell of ear protection so the only thing affected by the loudness of his music is the tavern itself.
“Whoops! Forgot about the eardrums. Thanks!” Ripplepaw yells over her music, continuing to sing, this time to How You Get The Girl.
Wait! *music stops* im new does anyone have food
Wiffi frowns, frustrated that the bridge of Cruel Summer got cut off. “Um, yeah, I think Foampaw has a stand on the last page if you wanna. Now, if you’ll excuse me…” She proceeds to turn back on the music.
(welcome to the Hazelpage! Enjoy the chaos :P)
“NOPE!” Ripplepaw replies, munching on her stash of waffles, and continues turning on her music, sitting on her speakers, and jumping along with the entirety of the Hazelpage.
“Yes, yes, ofc, here you go, your giant pancake you ordered on Amazon, coming right up!” Leopardpaw said, handing Stormpaw a huge pancake that flies out the window with Shimmz. “We do not take refunds, that will be $3,000 please! If you can get me a giant purple crayon, that can be negotiated!”
“I’ve decided to help our new newcomer! Can you take two giant purple crayons for me to make up for that pancake for Stormpaw!!”
Vixenpaw yells, “RANDOM DANCE PARTY FOR NO REASON” to the other 2 people in her grAy pancake base. She yells loud enough that all the Hazelpage could hear but couldn’t see where the yelling was from. She rushes out the secret entrance and sets up a booth where she checked the GrAy Pancake IDs of everyone that wanted to join. She rushes back in to play Chipi Chipi Chapa Chapa on repeat for 10 hours.
CHIPI CHIPI CHAPA CHAPA DUBI DUBI DABA DABA MÁGICO MI DUBI-DUBI BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
“Hey, Shoes, are you a grAy pancake person?” Vix asks.
“While I accept both sides, I am indeed a grAy pancake person,” Shoes says. “Except when it comes to Belgian waffles. Those things are good.”
“Welcome in!” Vix yells.
“Thank you!” Snowy yells back.
Icemeadow begins doing the Macarena, as he bangs his head furiously to the music.
Koi DANCES 💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃 “BEST PARTY EEVERRRRRR” The beat of the music can be felt all throughout the Hazelpage as Koipaw puts on sunglasses, an dims the lights. Rainbow spotlights fly all around the page.
“FREE FOOD AND CONFECTIONS FOR ALL GRAY PANCAKE SUPPORTERS. GRAY WAFFLE SUPPORTERS AND GREY PANCAKE SUPPORTERS ARE ALLOWED BUT MUST PAY. IF YOU ARE A GREY WAFFLE SUPPORTER IM EXPLODING YOUUUU”
💃💃💃💃
“YOU CAN’T EXPLODE MEEEEEEEEE” Ripplepaw dodges with her ✨aMaZING SpY SKilLS✨
Harpy Wynn climbs onto a table and raises a box of crayons into the air. “We must come to a conclusion; which crayon color tastes the best?” She yowls.
“Blue,” mumbles Snowbreeze over thirty blue crayons in her mouth. She spits them out and tries a red one. “No, red. Purple’s pretty good, too. Less mellow than blue. Yellow’s got a sunshiny flavor. Orange is too powerful. Okay. Either red, purple, or yellow. Mm, or teal. WHO’S WITH ME?”
Red is obviously the best (I refer you to my previous comment) 😛
Ooh, I’ll have to look 😛
Captain carefully takes a nibble at each crayon, pausing after each taste to judge the flavours mentally.
“They all seem to taste nostalgic, in a way”, mewed Captain thoughtfully. “Red was my favourite flavour during my kithood, though, so I suppose I’ll settle with that one.”
“White, personally.” Mallowpaw says, emerging from his cheese fortress.
“Well… Purple is good, Yellow is good, blue is okay, Lime is great… LIME IT IS!” Ripplepaw munches on lime crayons.
“Orange!” Pineconepaw says, stuffing her mouth with a bundle of orange crayons. “It makes my tongue feel numb enough to stop worrying about my unfinished assignments.”
“Cyan Crayon Supremacy!” Icemeadow shouts, not really into eating crayons, but Cyan’s his favorite color, and Cyan is perfect at everything it does.
“PURPLE OR YELLOW!” Holz yells as she rides by on her camel.
Flamilton smiles from where she’s still eating some delicious crayons. “I love how I helped start this war,” they grin as the chaos of everyone arguing over the best crayon
colorflavor unfolds around her.Hello everyone! I am new to the blog, and I love it already! My name is Crystalpaw/mist, and I am a big Squirrelstar fan. I have posted some articles, so check them out and comment if you want! Thank you for your kindness!
(This is better for the Intro page or Tavern! The Hazelpage is too chaotic for this, and honestly just doesn’t fit in!)
Hi Crystalpaw – Articles don’t come out immediately, so we’ll probably be able to read them in the next few months. Looking forward to reading them!
Hi Crystal! Welcome to the page of bottomless chaos and destruction :DD
Hi! ^^ Aren’t you Swiftshadow’s sister? Welcome! (Don’t tell anyone… but soon, I’ll be making some art for you lol)
“Purple!” Renda yowls! “It’s grape-flavored!”
“I do like grape…” Icemeadow mutters. He tries an edible purple crayon, hesitantly. It’s delicious. He has never eaten anything so delicious. He is reduced to tears by how scrumptious the purple crayon is. “Yeah, it’s pretty good,” he says after spending a few minutes basking in the deliciousness. Of the crayon.
(I love this comment oh my Goddjfj)
Meanwhile Everyone is discussing crayon flavor Cremos is making Caryon smoothies
“Orange is obliviously the best” she mummered LOUD enough to EVERYBODY to hear
“Hi! I’m an OCFCI, Official Crayon Flavor Color Inspector! Call me Koi! Could I try an orange crayon smoothie?”
Okay *gives her an orange crayon smoothie*
Cloudo looks around, and accidentally breaks a crayon under her paw. She shrugs, “Eh, markers are better,” then yanks a box of markers out of the clouds. Then, she gasped, “Oh no! These are cra-z-art markers! EVERYBODY RUN!!!”
She yeeted the box of markers to the moon, and turned to run, only to trip on the crayon she broke. She turned to look, and gasped, “It’s my worst nightmare… a shrek-colored crayon! AHHHAHAHAHHHHHHAHhAHAhahH!”
CREMOS JUMPS AT THE CRYAN BRECKS IT IN HALF AND TROWS IT IN THE SHREDDER
Koi stares in horror, before screaming like she did the day before when her sister jumpscared her. “N….Not the Cra-z-art markers!!!” She explodes the moon where the markers lay, praying to never see them again. “Guys, Crayola is better. It may not be amazing, but Crayola markers are better.”
She pulls out her colored pencils. “Who wants colored pencils though?”
Koi makes a stand titled ‘Peace in Color’
She dresses up in her car salesman suit.
“Sign up for yoga here! Free yoga classes! And, we have coloring! Yes, that’s right! Free yoga while coloring! We have crayons of every flavor, along with markers and colored pencils! And of course, coloring books! Crayon drinks supplied by Creamz, and confections made by me while I was in the party Vix was hosting!!”
She dances, and starts coloring a cat book.
” yeah get over her drinks made by me!!!! ” called creams
“ONLY IF ITS FREE FOR EVERYONE!” Ripplepaw replies, blasting Koi in the face with some coke and hiding under a table. “COKE/PEPSI FIGHT! I CHOOSE COKE! WHO’S WITH ME?!”
“I CHOSE PEPSI”” Creamypaw proceeds to trow a Pepsi grenade under the table where Ripplepaw
“also i was free” then runs before the pepsi grenade explodes
“I choose neither, they’re both the same anyways :<", said Cloudo, then she throws pancakes at all the soda supporters. "I like lemonade better than anything!"
Vix chomps a pancake and brings CloudPaw to her pancake party. “You do like pancakes, right?” she mutters.
Creamos barges in the conversation and says “No Pepsi is sweeter then chocolate is kinda to sweet and Dr pepper is the right amount of sweet! “
“HEY!” Vixenpaw yowls and then proceeds to spray Cremo with TADC flavored crayon smoothies. “I LIKE YOUR JAX SMOOTHIES! THEY’RE PURPLE! AND YELLOW!” Vixenpaw yells. She then jumps out the window only to come back in again with a gallon of Jax crayon smoothies. “I GOT KEYS EVERYWHERE!” She yells, quoting Jax, her favorite character, and proceeds to laugh maniacally while rolling on the floor, choking on her smoothie. She disappears for a millisecond and comes back in Jax armor. “I CAN’T WAIT FOR THE SECOND EPISODE!” She screeches. (fr tho i cant wait)
“YES JAX IS THE BEST”
proceeds to flood the place with Jax’s smoothies
Vixenpaw jumps in the smoothies and prays to starclan to make it rain Jax smoothies. It starts to rain Jax smoothies. She runs to her pancake base to play her favorite song on repeat 10 hours… THE BLUEY THEME SONG!!! (help im in middle school 🥲)
“Yeah; between the two, I’d have to go for coke,” Icemeadow says, buying out an entire supermarket’s supply of the soda. It’s not that he really loves Coke, he just refuses to go halfway with anything he does.
“YEAHHH! CMON, LET’S GO FIND SOME MORE PEOPLE!” Ripplepaw yowls at her new teammate in the coke vs pepsi fight, even though they both taste the same.
Vixenpaw grabs the two and brings them, blindfolded, to her new coke wing in her pancake base.