The Hazelpage

The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.

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[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]

Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.

Notice Board:
Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.

14,438 comments

  • Rainpaw woke up from her unintentional nap. “What’s going on?” she asked mildly.

  • Brighty appeared in her poof of smoke. With her jaw set, she walked to the counter, sat down, and said, “I have a series of extremely important philosophical questions to ask.

    If all the world’s a stage, where does the audience sit?

    Why are the letters in the alphabet in the order that they are?

    Isn’t Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

    Why is Greenland called Greenland if it’s covered with snow?

    Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies?

    By any chance, would you allow me to acquire a drink free of cost?”

  • Bluefire breaks out into song.
    “Right here, right now
    “I put the offer out
    “I don’t want to chase you down
    “I know you see it
    “You run with me
    “And I can cut you free
    “Out of the drudgery and walls you keep in
    “So trade that typical for something colorful
    “And if it’s crazy, live a little crazy
    “You can play it sensible, a king of conventional
    “Or you can risk it all and see!”
    She tosses the microphone into the air for someone to catch and sing the next part of the song.

    • Rose caught it. The spotlight shone on her.
      “Don’t you wanna get away from the same old part you gotta play
      ‘Cause I got what you need, so come with me and take the ride
      It’ll take you to the other side
      ‘Cause you can do like you do
      Or you can do like me
      Stay in the cage, or you’ll finally take the key
      Oh, darn! Suddenly you’re free to fly
      It’ll take you to the other side!”

      • Bluefire continued singing.
        “Okay, my friend, you want to cut me in
        “Well I hate to tell you, but it just won’t happen
        “So thanks, but no
        “I think I’m good to go
        “‘Cause I quite enjoy the life you say I’m trapped in
        “Now I admire you, and that whole show you do
        “You’re onto something, really it’s something
        “But I live among the swells, and we don’t pick up peanut shells
        “I’ll have to leave that up to you.”
        She tosses the mic back.

        • Rose caught it. She belted out the next part.
          “Don’t you know that I’m okay with this uptown part I get to play
          ‘Cause I got what I need and I don’t want to take the ride
          I don’t need to see the other side
          So go and do like you do
          I’m good to do like me
          Ain’t in a cage, so I don’t need to take the key
          Oh, darn! Can’t you see I’m doing fine
          I don’t need to see the other side!”

  • Rose shouted at Cheetah, “I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE!!!” She placed the hat inside a hat, then made that hat poof. She made a stage appear, then climbed up on it, grabbing the attention of some people. She grabbed the microphone.
    “Cause baby now we got bad blood
    You know it used to be mad love
    So take a look at what you’ve done
    ‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
    Now we got problems
    And I don’t think we can solve them
    You made a really deep cut
    And baby now we got bad blood! Hey!”

    • Bluefire clambered onto the stage next to Rose.
      “Did you have to do this?
      “I was thinking that you could be trusted
      “Did you have to ruin what was shining now it’s all rusted
      “Did you have to hit me where I’m weak baby I couldn’t breathe
      “I rubbed it in so deep
      “Salt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me
      “Oh, it’s so sad to think about the good times
      “You and I”

    • Cheetah slowly stalked towards the stage, her fingers twitching near her gun holster. She not-so-gently ripped the mic off of the counter and began to sing:
      “Did. You. Have to do this?
      I was thinking that you could be trusted
      Did. You. Have to ruin
      What was shining now it’s all rusted
      Did. You. Have to hit me
      Where I’m weak baby I couldn’t breathe
      I rubbed it in so deep
      Salt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me
      Oh, it’s so sad to think about the good times
      You and Ieyeyeyeyeyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

    • Rose appeared between Cheetah and Fireix.
      “Cause baby now we got bad blood
      You know it used to be mad love
      So take a look at what you’ve done
      ‘Cause baby now we got bad blood
      Now we got problems
      And I don’t think we can solve them
      You made a really deep cut
      And baby now we got bad blood! Hey!”
      She smiled.

      • Ivy LOVED singing. She picked up her guitar, then leapt up into the stage beside Rose and Fireix.

        “Now,” she announced, hoping to silence everyone. “We shall start off with a song, and let Rose, Fireix, Cheetah and anyone else who wishes to join keep it going as far as possible. Three, two, one go!
        And she broke into song, playing her guitar to the tune.

        “I am not a stranger to the dark
        “Hide away
        “They say
        “‘Cause no one will want your broken parts
        “I’ve learned to be ashamed of all my scars
        “Run away
        “They say
        “‘Cause no one will love you as you are
        “But, I won’t let them break me down to dust
        “I know that there’s a place for us
        “For we are glorious . . .”

        She passed the microphone to Rose, waiting for her to sing.

        • Rose took the microphone, launching into the song softly.
          “When the sharpest words wanna cut me down
          I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out
          I am brave, I am bruised
          I am who I’m meant to be, this is me
          Look out ’cause here I come
          And I’m marching on to the beat I drum
          I’m not scared to be seen
          I make no apologies, this is me”
          The spotlight danced as Rose passed the microphone to Cheetah.

          • (oof late)
            “Oh-oh-oh-oh
            Oh-oh-oh-oh
            Oh-oh-oh-oh
            Oh-oh-oh-oh
            Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh, oh
            Another round of bullets hits my skin
            Well, fire away ’cause today, I won’t let the shame sink in
            We are bursting through the barricades and
            Reaching for the sun
            Yeah, that’s what we’ve become”
            She passed the mic reluctantly to Fireix.

  • Rainpaw surveyed the scene with a touch of wariness. She sat down to listen to the singing.

  • Bluefire turned her speaker way up and started singing to the music. The song, Ways to be Wicked, was from the sort-of recent movie Descendants 2. She hoped she wasn’t the only one who liked it.

    We got all the ways to be
    W-i-c-k-e-d
    We got all the ways to be
    W-i-c-k-e-d
    C’mon hey hey hey hey hey
    Hey hey hey hey (haha)
    Hey hey hey hey hey

    Crashin’ the party, guess they lost my invention
    Friendly reminder got my own kinda persuasion
    Looks like this place could use a bit of misbehavior
    Happily ever after with a little flavor
    Bad to the bone, with even worse intentions
    We’re gonna steal the show, and leave ’em all defenseless
    A fairy tale life can be oh-so overrated
    So raise your voices and let’s get it activated

    • Rose loved that movie. She sang along.
      “Long live having some fun
      We take what we want
      There’s so many ways to be wicked
      With us
      Evil lives on
      The right side of wrong
      There’s so many ways to be wicked!”
      She stomped along to the music, flashing an evil grin.

      • Potato jumped on stage and bursted into song.

        “Apple, apple dip, dip
        Wanna try it?
        Tick, tick
        Take a bite, c’mon, be bold
        Change the way the story’s told!”

  • A cold breeze sweeps out beyond, brushing out the snow, but in a house of singing cats, the voices fight the wind, loud and strong. They say:

    “You stumble through your days”
    “Got your head hung low”
    “Your skies’ a shade of grey”
    “Like a zombie in a maze”
    “You’re asleep inside”
    “But you can shake away”
    “‘Cause you’re just a dead man walking”
    “Thinking that’s your only option”
    “But you can flip the switch and brighten up your darkest day”
    “Sun is up and the color’s blinding”
    “Take the world and redefine it”
    “Leave behind your narrow mind”
    “You’ll never be the same…”

    • (Now everyone’s doing it 😛 )
      Rose heard the melodious voice and appeared with a microphone (she always has it somewhere..)
      “Come alive”
      “Come alive”
      “Go and ride your light”
      ”Let it burn so bright”
      “Reaching up”
      “To the sky”
      “And it’s open wide”
      ”You’re electrified”
      The lights turned out. Then a disco ball appeared out of nowhere along with about twenty different backup singers.
      ”When the world becomes a fatansy”
      “And you’re more than you could ever be”
      ‘”Cause you’re dreaming with your eyes wide open”
      “And you know you can’t go back again”
      “To the world that you were living in”
      “’Cause you’re dreaming with your eyes wide open”
      “So, come alive!”

      • “I see it in your eyes”
        “You believe that lie”
        “That you need to hide your face”
        “Afraid to step outside”
        “So you lock the door”
        “But don’t you stay that way”
        “No more living in those shadows”
        “You and me we know how that goes”
        “‘Cause once you see it, oh you’ll never, never be the same”

  • Karaoke lyrics for “Flashlight” from Pitch Perfect 2 come on a previously invisible screen.
    “When tomorrow comes…”

  • Ivy was actually happy now. She decided to start a new song. She didn’t know the chords to this one, so she turned up the speakers and held out the mic.
    “Hey everyone! Let’s sing our second song! This one, is Seventeen from Heathers! If you don’t know it, you can pass your turn. Just pass the mic to the next person,”

    She played the song, and started.
    “Fine.
    We’re damaged.
    Really damaged.
    But that does not make us wise.
    We’re not special.
    We’re not different.
    We don’t choose who lives or dies.
    Let’s be normal, see bad movies,
    Sneak a beer and watch TV
    We’ll bake brownies,
    Then go bowling”
    And she passed the microphone to Rose, hoping for her to know the song.

    • (Welp I don’t)
      (But)
      (GOOGLE SHALL COME TO MY RESCUE 😀 )
      Rose took the microphone hesitantly, before breathing in sharply and singing louder then before.
      “Don’t you want a life with me?
      Can’t we be seventeen?
      That’s all I want to do
      If you could let me in
      I could be good with you
      People hurt us
      Or they vanish
      And you’re right, that really blows
      But we let go..
      Take a deep breath
      Then go buy some summer clothes
      We’ll go camping..
      Play some poker
      And we’ll eat some chili fries
      Maybe prom night
      Maybe dancing
      Don’t stop looking in my eyes
      Your eyes…”
      She waited for someone to grab the microphone as she held it out.

      • No one did, so Ivy gladly chimed in again.
        “Can’t we be seventeen?
        Is that so hard to do?
        If you could let me in
        I could be good with you
        Let us be seventeen
        If we still got the right
        So what’s it gonna be?
        I wanna be with you
        I wanna be with you
        Wanna be with you
        Tonight!”

        She waited for the music change to the sad bit of the song as she held out the microphone . . .

        (Total Google save! 😀 I needed it for this bit 😛 ((I know the first part off by heart, but this bit, uh,)) )

        • Brighty appeared in her poof of smoke out of nowhere and took the microphone, singing in her weird singing voice.
          “Yeah, we’re damaged
          Badly damaged
          But your love’s too good to lose
          Hold me tighter
          Even closer
          I’ll stay if I’m what you choose
          If we’ve still got the right
          ‘Cause you’re the one I choose
          You’re the one I choose
          You’re the one I choose!”
          Brighty disappeared again.

  • A strange stranger covered in dark robes enters the tavern. He walks up to the counter, asking for a double butterbeer. He is constantly looking over at Rose, which makes her very very curious.

    Rose whispers to Cheetah, “Doesn’t that guy look familiar?”