The Hug Page

So this is going to be a very long and stupid rant that I really need to get out. Here we go.
So there is this really mean teacher ( Lets call her ms. Foxheart) at my school who works with kids who need help in reading, she is also our ‘lunch moderater’ (basically she goes around yelling at kids who are talking… during lunch why is that a problem?) anyway I’m a patrol in the library at my school which means I put away books and make posters stuff like that. I LOVE WORKING AT THE LIBRARY! But today at lunch ms. Foxheart told me all the library patrols are getting fired and we should go ask the head of the patrols mr. Bearclaw ( Our PE instructer) for different patrolling areas. She didn’t tell me why, and told us the only day the other librarian at the library wasn’t there. I waited outside mr. Bearclaws office and he told me he basically didn’t care and I should do what ms. Foxheart say’s! On top of that I hurt a classmate that I really respect and I feel really bad about it but can’t tell her. I’ve had an awful day and I’m afraid it will turn into an awful rest of the school year. I am really sad and nervous and need a lt of help. My moms in New York and my dad picks me up from school pretty late and I don’t want to disturb him with my baby-ish rants. I really need some advice

We have a dog named Pumpkin. We adopted her and she has a hurt leg, don’t know what happened to it, perhaps she got hit by a car or something like that. Anyway, she’s a real sweetheart, everybody, including myself, fell in love with her. But she has some fierce teeth, and she shows them whenever we get too close to her hurt leg. My sister went into my room, where Pumpkin was sleeping, I was petting her, when my sister started to roughhouse with me. And not in a playful way, She was mad at me, for whatever reason. She almost always is. She’s younger though, only by a year. Defending myself, I pushed her on the bed, and the push sent her a little too close to Pumpkin. Pumpkin showed her teeth and barked in a warning way at her. She got realy afraid and had tears in her eyes.

This kind of thing happened to me once before, so I understood exactly what was going on. When it happened to me, I was in the bed, silently weeping at the shock of it all, when my sister came in and said in a mean-tease way, “Are you crying?” I closed my eyes and didn’t answer. She felt no sympathy. so she continued mocking me. Until our parents came in and told her to get to bed.

This just happened to her, and our parents came rushing in. To help her little sweet soul, BAH. She got mad at me even more for pushing her into Pumpkin.

My sister has been bullying me for years now, and she acts like the older sister when she’s not. She teases me about my strengths, puting me down when I feel good about myself. She mocks me for being bad at math and logic, and I’m tired of it all. I’m very weak and I cannot stand up for myself. I have this thing where I put myself into other’s shoes and see what they are feeling in the situations. But I feel like I’ve done that enough. I feel like I should take care of myself in the thing that happened with Pumpkin. Which is why I feel almost no sympathy for her. I sucked it all up. And I feel like she deserves it for doing all those mean things to me.

Another thing: I am really scared, too scared to go to school and my belly feels funny and I’m nervous I’m going to vomit. Thanks for reading my rant.