The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.
[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]
Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.
Notice Board: Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.
HIIII!
ignore the fact I am too lazy to come here regularly 😛hi! what side are you on? :3
star wars side, I was the one who started it actually 😏 /lh
No, I started it, actually😏
wait- but I’m the one who did the announcement? on this page?
Yeah, you officially started it, but I came with the idea!
okie dokie :))
Imagine being on the Star Wars side could not be me ahahaha /lhj /nsrs
the more i look at the comments on this page the more confused I get
“Our plan is WORKING!” Foampaw cackles.
Flamilton cackles, fist-bumping King Foamy. “WE’RE BASICALLY EVIL GENIUSES!!!”
Robo nods, opening up a bag and pulling out magictastical backflipping rubber ducks. “AMAZING!!”
“Here here!!” Flamilton grins, holding up a juicebox in celebration. “RAISE A JUICEBOX TO FREEDOM!!” /ref
“SOMETHING THEY CAN NEVER TAKE AWAY!” /ref Foampaw cheers, bumping her juice box with Flam’s.
“NO MATTER WHAT THEY TELL YOU… ” sings Robo, drinking her juice box
“NO MATTER WHAT CATNIP TELLS YOU!” Flamilton sings along, happily sipping the true drink of kings.
“RAISE A GLASS TO FREEDOM!” /ref Brindlenose sings, holding up a microphone while ignoring the exploding confetti bombs in the background. Brindlenose holds up a glass of chocolate milk, not really liking juice. (irl i like it tho TvT)
“We’ll tell the story of tonight!” Lightayette raised his glass
“Let’s have another round tonight.” Brindlenose grabs another box of juiceboxes and chocolate milk.
Flamilton loudly sips xer apple juice. It’s absolutely refreshing, however it seems now everyone is staring at xem.
“Haha! We’ll take over the world, but be cool and give everyone good jobs and be kind unlike the Catnip and TADC sides that manipulate and try to mind-control!”
now I know your plan >:D
don’t tell… 🤫
“too late!” silvs pops up from an underground tunnel where she overheard the plan. “muahahaha!”
“Hah! Not like that was our real plan!” Brindlenose laughs demonically.
Silvs holds up a folder of plans (signed by the triple-h team) from rummaging through a drawer. “So you say?” /lh
“We’re changing our ideas, you’ll never find our real form of plans!” Brindlenose cackles. “Those were only our old plans!”
Flamilton blinks. “No, that was the contract we had someone sign, giving their soul to the H’s!” they say, absolutely offended Silvy has the audacity to think they did something they most certainly 100% didn’t do. /lh
Lionpaw unhelpfully pops up. She glances at the contract. “Oh, that’s mine!” she mews casually. Not like she sold her soul to the Triple – H’s. No way. Totally not.
Foampaw, after watching Hamilton for the 78,000th time, jumps on a table and starts randomly singing The Schuyler Sisters.
“ANGELICAAA✨✨”
“ELIZAAAAaaaAA!😧😧”
“and 💥PEGGY!💥”
“WORK!” shouts Lionpaw, doing the iconic Angelica ‘work’ move.
“LOOK AROUND, LOOK AROUND, AT HOW LUCKY WE ARE TO BE ALIVE RIGHT NOWWWW!” Flamilton runs around the Hazelpage in an And Peggy dress because ✨ style✨
“DADDY SAID TO BE HOME BY SUNDOWN!” Foampaw continues to sing.
“DADDY DOESN’T NEED TO KNOW!” yowls Lionpaw.
“DADDY SAID NOT TO GO DOWNTOWN!” Flamilton cries, running after King Foamy and Liomadison.
“Like I said, you’re free to go!” Lightayette catches up with them and pats Flamilton on the head repeatedly because he’s tall and Flamilton canonically isn’t /lh
“Flamilton canonically isn’t” oh my god I started choking on air while reading that 😭 😭 😭
I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I’M 5’5″ SIR /lhj 😛
i think im the only not canonically tall person 😔😔😔
and then theres me, 4 foot 9 ;-; the canonically short person
Not me who’s 4”7 😭😭“THE SCHUYLER SISTERS!” Brindlenose sings.
“THE SCHUYLER SISTERSS!” Flamilton sings along, throwing glitter everywhere.
“Hey, only I get to sing Schuyler sisters because I almost chose Liongelica!” /j Liomadison screams.
what
I do not understand Hamilton…
same
you’re kidding right…. *cries to death* /j
Me neither
me too😗
your lying
please say your lying /lh
‘Ok, who wants to be wacked with a crayon-shaped light sabor that sings the Three Cabelleros theme song when it wacks somebody???? I actually don’t care if you want to, Imma do it anyways😛’ Darth Fallow says.
“No one.” Brindlenose says simply. “King Foamy III will whack you with their staff before you can even say ‘CATNIP’.” Brindlenose grins, blinking at King Foamy III with a gaze reading: ‘hit Catnip and TADC with your staff!!! We can win this war with stunned enemies. Triple-H is too awesome to be beaten!’ or something along those lines. The definite clear thing her gaze read was: ‘kill their friends and families… to remind them of your love!’ (no actual murder shall be commited, only whack-by-staff.) (yes i came up with whack-by-staff im just too cool /hj)
i shall challenge you to a fight with crayon shaped light sabers that sing the three caballeros theme song when it whacks somebody!! says Luke Skyshiner
Okie!!!! WACK!!!
Flamilton proceeds to wack Fallow with their own copy of Lucifer’s staff, and skips away merrily before Fallow gets the chance to retaliate.
BUT Darth Fallow flies to Flam with her space ship and then WACKS!!!!
Flucifer is now angy. They inhale sharply. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you!” They grin evilly.
Lionpaw naruto-runs up to fallow’s ship, yeeting magic jambalaya that disintigrates the ship. She cackles loudly.
“Well!” Flamilton says to Lio, now walking back to the Triple-H tower. “I’m starved! Who wants some jambalaya?” /ref 😛 😛
“MEEEEE!” Lionpaw screams excitedly. *me who has never had jambalaya before 🤫*
“YES!!” yells Robo, grabbing bowls.
“LIO!” Flam gasps. “You HAVE to try jambalaya, then! IT’SLIKETHEBESTTHINGEVERANDYOUHAVETOTRYITANDYOUJUSTHAVETOOHMYBARNEY” Flamilton sobs.
“Nobody needs to know,” Lionpaw whisper-sings to Flam. /ref
“The people won’t know what we know,” Flamilton agrees. /ref
Brindlenose goes back to becoming an exoplanet, but instead of Brindle-487b, her very own exoplanet… she becomes a new star. Just born through a process. Then, she sets her star-gaze on Fallowpaw and explodes, comets racing down from the sky. (ignores there’s probably a roof on the tavern thingy the Hazelpage is in) The star, Brindlenose, now returns back to being normal Brindlenose, watching as people (or should I say cats? /hj) dodge the comets. She grins evilly. “YOU WON’T HARM THE HAMILSQUAD MEMBERS AND GET AWAY WITH IT!!” (aka i’m just protective irl LOL)
Rosepaw magically appears after taking a blog break and notices the crayon light saber. She walks up to Fallowpaw and face palms herself. “How did I never think of that?!” She shouts randomly out loud. “Fallowpaw, this is perfect! Now everyone will bow to the Caballeros side! Look out Triple H and catnip…we’re coming for ya!!!” Then she begins singing The Three Caballeros theme song at top volume, even though she basically skipped the beginning.
“OHHHHHHHHH……WE HAVE DA STARS TO GUIDE US…GUITARS HERE BESIDE US….TO PLAY AS WE GOOOOOOOOO….” Then she pauses, now out of breath.
*steals cookies from everyone who is team styrofoam in artfight and blasts the team styrofoam base with a sprinkle cannon* /lhj
||SPOILERS FOR THE TEAMS IN ARTFIGHT||
styrofoam stands for seafoam and sawdust stands for stardust, thank you lightningpaw/strike for thinking that up in the blogclan discord server :3
sobbing styrofoam and sawdust 😭
so real
Woohoo clout /lh
This explains the very existence of the world
pfft- xD
SEAFOAM IS BETTER THAN STARDUST!!!!!!!😛
NAHHHH STARDUST FOR DA WIN 😛 😛 😛
NOPEEEEEEEEE SEAFOAM IS DA BESTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!😛
STARDUST HAS LIKE SO MANY MORE PEOPLE THAN SEAFOAM AHAHA /lh
I DON’T CARE!!!!! THE UNDERDOGS ARE ALWAYS BETTER!!!!!!!!!😛
A tired Pumpkinpaw looks around at the chaos as she drinks some sort of concoction of coffee, catnip, and chocolate. When she gets her energy back, she starts throwing catnip all over the place. “It’s been a hot minute since I’ve been here, but I AM BACK AND TEAM CATNIP SHALL WIN THIS WARRRRRRR!”
“N000000OOOO000OOO!” Brindlenose throws away 3 glasses of chocolate milk she had just drank. “TRIPLE-H WILL ALWAYS WIN!” She yowls, eyes narrowed in fury.
Flamilton laughs. “Have to disagree with you there!” /ref they grin. “WE SHALL FIGHT THE FIGHT AND WIN THE WAR!” /ref
that is a Hamilton reference I understand, which is rare 😛
FOR YOUR LOVE, FOR YOUR PRAISE
Queen Frogpaw the eleventh looked out at her chaotic kingdom, they must’ve learned it from her. There were more wars than her 21 IQ could count. This had to stop!
It was time for the peace signal.
🤫🧏♀️
PEACE?! ARE YOU CARZY?! NEVAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!! *fires at team Stardust*
Flamilton gasps at Froggo. “PARDON ME, ARE YOU MEWING MASTER, SIR?” /ref they yell maniacally. Then they pause. “Oh yeah. THE WAR SHALL NEVER END, I ASSURE YOU MY DEAR FRIEND!! :DD” Flamilton proceeds to wack Fallow with their magictastical staff.
Liomadison poofs into existence (when I realize all my interactions on the hp were in a reply to u flam 😶) “THAT DEPENDS, WHO’S ASKING?” she yowls. 🤫🧏♀️
“OH WELL SURE, SIR. MY NAME IS SIGMA RIZZLER. I’M AT YOUR SERVICE, MEWING MASTER, SIR!” Brindlenose shouts. (i dont know the brainrot hamilton stuff, im just guessing 😌)
*proceeds to wack Flam back with her magistastical light sabor*
*shoves flamilton out of the way* 😌
silvs attempts to flip the page for no reason.
your attempt failed….
Whyyyyyyyyyy???????? Page flips are no fun!
“ Umm… which side should I join?”
Flamilton appears from the shadows. “wELL hello there, you wayward sinner!” /ref they grin, twirling their staff in their hands. “Might I recommend joining the Triple-H’s? We have cookies!” they offer.
Lionpaw slides into view and begins a musical number, Alastor-style. “Well, I think that the Triple-H side is superior. We’ve combined two whole fandoms together: Hamilton and Hazbin Hotel! And also, we have the most people on our side! And better references! And characters! And ships!” Lionpaw gasps, spotting an unitentional Hamilton ref. “…and so the balance shifts!” she stage-whispers. She continues her Alastor song because why not. “…and all that jazz!” She finishes, panting. “So…whadaya say?”
“And free merchandise!” Alasquirt adds, popping up from their invisible existence. “Sorry I’ve been gone for so long, but I baked some new cookies! Here!” https://freeimage.host/i/d33P2Bn
(Ngl I actually made these along with some thumb cookies but we already ate the thumb cookies 😭)
Umm… I never watched Hamilton before… Or Star Wars… Or Three Cabelleros. Any other sides?
catnip side, WolfClan side (ravage’s sps: https://blogclan.katecary.co.uk/wolfclan/ )
Robo adds, “AND to get in all you have to do is ̶m̶a̶k̶e̶ ̶a̶ ̶d̶e̶a̶l̶ sHAKE MY HAND! Ignore the fire!” holding out her hand.
Lionpaw slides into view and begins a musical number, Alastor-style. “Well, I think that the Triple-H side is superior. We’ve combined two whole fandoms together: Hamilton and Hazbin Hotel! And also, we have the most people on our side! And better references! And characters! And ships!” Lionpaw gasps, spotting an unitentional Hamilton ref. “…and so the balance shifts!” she stage-whispers. She continues her Alastor song because why not. “…and all that jazz!” She finishes, panting. “So…whadaya say?”
“Triple H, of course!” Brindlenose replies. Her eyes widen, and they become large in a puppy-eyes way. “Please, please join Triple H!” Brindlenose begs. “We have awesome references, music, songs, etc! We also have good plans and humor!” (not like the other side(s) dont have good humor, but ay, its a war!) She nods slowly. “We also don’t take your soul! Those are just rumors, honestly!” She holds up a jar of odd floating blue orbs. “These aren’t real souls,” she nods at them. “Just sea glass I melted.” (first thing that came to my mind frfr)
STAR WARS AND THREE CABELLEROS!!!!! Crayon side is kinda dead since Splashy left😛
Flucifer shoves Fallow aside. “IGNORE HER CHIRPING!” /ref they yell, smiling at Skyz. “Did I mention we have cookies?”
But WE have MILKSHAKES!!!!
“Hi, Sky! Your sister is in the Catnip Army so you should join (:” Silvs opens her backpack to show a stash of catnip cookies and catnip gummy bears. “These are supposed to make you smarter! (plus they’re DELICIOUS.) You can have all you want if you join! :DD”
*Notice: I am not the leader of the catnip army, Pumpkinpaw/dawn is :3
Pumpkinpaw uses her ✨aesthetic spawning power✨ to spawn out of nowhere and has the contract. “That’s right! Here at the Catnip Army, you will always have catnip available, and you won’t be destroyed when we win the war! And I’ve got a secret…” Pumpkinpaw lowers her voice to a whisper. “I’ve overheard the convos of the Triple-H’s, they steal souls! The Catnip Army would never do anything like that, except to our enemies, of course. SO JOIN TODAY!!!”
“Urghhhhhh,” Lío groans. “For the last time, we don’t steal souls! All our members WILLINGLY signed a contract binding their soul to the Triple H, including me!” She holds out her harmless contract out so they can see.
*Holds up the pen to sign the catnip contract* “That sounds like a pretty good deal! “
I’m going to be inactive for at least a couple days, maybe weeks. I’ll come on sometimes, but I’ll be really busy.
“I like tacos”
“I like pIZza”
tacos are delicious
Twisted WAS hiding under an old tomato crate BUT she can’t stand not being in the chaos.
Magnolia was crouching under a cardboard box as catnip suddenly fell from the air in front of her and Magnolia started with a yelp of surprise. “Wha-”
Then she stares confused at Twisted as Twisted starts eating the catnip. “YOU EAT THAT—?????”
Holz the skibidi sigma alpha rizzler jumps in after being very inactive in this wonderful place and resumes being chaotic, shooting burritos from her mouth and singing Never Gonna Give You Up VERY LOUDLY, a combination not thought possible.
NEVER GONNA GIVE DEFEATING TRIPLE H UP
NEVER GONNA LET TRIPLE H WIN
…
*picks up a giant tv and starts rickrolling the entire hazelpage* MWAHAHAHAHA
NEVER GONNA RUN AWAY AND LET TRIPLE H RULE
ALWAYS GONNA MAKE TRIPLE H CRY
ALWAYS GONNA TELL TRIPLE H BYE-BYE
BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLAAAAA I FORGOT THE LYRICS
You just got… RICKROLLED!!!😛
*snorts at fallows attempt at a rickroll* /lh