The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.
[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]
Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.
Notice Board: Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.
“MUA HA HA!” screeches Ttera, leaping onto a table with her Skathe-Hrün (Shadow Staff) in her hand (paw? Hand? Claw? ) “I WILL NOW TAKE OVER THE WORLD!”
“But not until I finish Trollhunters. I need to see what happens.”
“Yay a speedy mod reveal yourself.”
“Nah.”
“You just did.” Captain mews to Embix, purring in amusement.
Redblaze stares at the spot where the mod had been. “The secrets of the mods shall be revealed”
i still don’t understand this page it slightly scares me
“FEAR KEEPS YOU ALIVE!” yells Ttera.
“Don’t be too hard on the newcomer.” Captain meows.
Redblaze nods solemnly.
“They need to be taught the ways of the Hazelpage”
It’s a roleplay page you don’t have to understand. It’s just the hazelpage.
Lappy shyly peeks in, having followed the trail a wild Embix had left in the Recent Purrs. She looks from side to side, and slinks into a corner booth, happy to observe all the happenings of the tavern.
“Hi!” Turtle mews, walking up to Lappy. “Mind if I join you?” they ask.
MothPool foreverLappy jumps nervously, eyes widening. “Oh!” she squeaks out, before clearing her throat and lowing her voice to attempt to sound tougher(it doesn’t work). “Sure.”
Redblaze pads across. “Hello there”
Aquila yeets herself across the room and lands of her feet, wobbling in an attempt to stay upright, she adds her hello to Redblaze’s before clutching a table to stop herself from falling.
Lappy laughs, cackling like a hyena(I hate my laugh). “You should watch your step… I’m Lappy.”
Aquila joins in with an evil laugh that makes her sound evil. 😛 “I’m clumsy!” she grins. She uses her mind reading powers that her mentor taught her and adds, “And you’re my long lost cousin.”
Redblaze blinks. “I’m much clumsier than you! Remember when I burnt myself on the oven while wearing oven gloves?”
Lappy gasps and jumps to her feet. “Oh my sugar cookies, really? Then let’s try to do the family dance…” Lappy starts doing some awful dance moves because she cannot dance.
Aquila tries to join in but trips on a chair leg and falls flat on the floor. She picks herself up laughing, “See, told you I was clumsy! I’ve always been awful at dancing- I’m so ungraceful!”
Redblaze looks at them both. “I’m just not flexible at all. I had foot problems because my hips aren’t flexible enough”
“Oh gosh!” gasps Aquila, “I’ve got to go to the opticians today, so I guess I’ll see if my eyes are good enough😛 my eyes just seem to get worse and worse every time they get checked by the opticians XD”
You don’t wear glasses Aquila!
No I don’t, but I am shortsighted in my left eye! Thank goodness for my right eye being fine or I would have to wear glasses!
Redblaze gives her a confused look. “ONE eye? I’m shortsighted in both and also have astigmatism and a squint (though they did an operation to fix that)”
“Yeah! I’m shortsighted in my left eye but my right eye is normal! Oh whoa!!! My dad also has a squint!” mews Aquila.
“I had an operation when I was about two and I won’t go into the details”
(I honestly have no idea what this is-)
same bro same
(am I doing this right XD)
Hollykit walked into the Hazelpage. She hoped no one wondered why a kit was here. She just came, because, hecc, why not
my mental age is a kit dont worry
I just need to clear this up.
SAME.
“Hi, Hollykit!” Pinestripe mewed cheerfully.
“Pinestripe?” Captain mewed. “Is that you?”
Redblaze smiles. “Welcome to the hazelpage!”
(let it work its magic on you)
ahh hai, I just came :] I’m blackies friend/enemy
wait a moment is that you egg >:0
i shouldnt have sent that link to youCaptain stares at the two arguing cats/people/“I don’t even know at this moment”s in utter confusion. She tries very hard not to laugh.
blackie takes out a cane and puts it on captain’s mouth
Redblaze jumps forwards. “Woah there violence isn’t necessary”
“But it’s the best bit.” Aquila complains.
“We don’t need your opinions Aquila” Redblaze shoots her a glare.
“I don’t think that’s necessary, Blackie…”
“Kitchen raid, anyone?” Bright stands up and licks her chest, tilting her head as if imagining devouring the donuts already.
Hollykit ran up to her. Her eyes shone in excitement. “y e s”
“yES lETS gET sOMe cOoKIES” screams blackie/crow. he runs toward the kitchen
“Custard creams?” Redblaze offers
(wait they’re biscuits)
“aS LoNG AS tHeRE aRE aPplE PiES InvOlvED.”
“And cinnamon buns?” Redblaze’s ears prick up hopefully.
Lappy hesitantly stands up. “A-and brownies? I’ve never done anything bad before, so I suppose this would be the first time!” She chuckles nervously. “Let’s do it!”
Lappy gasps, looking around. “Where did the Speedy Mod go?!”
“Really?” gasps Aquila, “I’ve done plenty of bad things! I am quite the disruptive student when I want to be. Me and Redblaze like tricking teachers with caramel wafer wrappers and oh gosh my music teacher’s reaction was simply the best!!!“
Redblaze laughs. “yes now goodbye because I have to do my geography lesson”
“We should trick your geography teacher when we go back to school…” Aquila mews thoughtfully.
Aquila gasps horrified at her own words, “oh gosh I just remembered who your geography teacher is; she’s my thinking skills teacher. If we tricked her we’d end up in detention for sure- she screamed and yelled at me just for laughing in her class!”
Redblaze nods solemnly. “She would literally MURDER you”
(I think she has a particular dislike of you especially Aquila XD)
(Yes she does but I think she hates my class in general 😛 there are some people in my class she hates even more that me!)
Redblaze thinks for a moment. “One of my friends says she tells her class that they’re her least favourite” she thinks again. “She’s all bark and no bite really she said she’d give me a detention once but she never did”
Aquila chuckles slightly, “I think most classes are her least favourite; she hates us all. Honestly idk why she’s a teacher, she doesn’t even like children!”
“Teachers are very strange creatures”
(Hey! That rhymes!)
Lappy laughs. “That does sound funny… but I’ve always been very obediant.” She rubs the back of her neck nervously, a small smile on her face.
“Well, obedience is a good trait!” smiles Aquila, “And one I never had. I never had patience either!” She flashes her eyes gold and her cat Honey appears in her arms who she hugs tightly, “This is Honey, she’s my cat!” she grins.
Redblaze thinks for a moment. “Obedience is good as long as you don’t follow every order without question.” she smiles.
“The only thing I usually get in trouble for is forgetting books, homework or getting distracted in the lesson”
Lappy shrieks happily and jumps forward, starting to pet Honey. “I love cats so much! But I don’t get to have a cat…” She sighs sadly, then perks up as she keeps petting Honey.
“Well she can be a family cat!” says Aquila, placing Honey in Lappy’s arms, “Careful though, she is a little heavy – she likes her cat biscuits too much!”
Redblaze picks up one of her cats, Merlin. “Try lifting him he literally is like a rock- he’s small but weighs loads”
“And he’s named after one of the best TV series in the world!!!” grins Aquila, stroking Merlin, “Although, Agravaine is a better character than Merlin…”
Redblaze blinks. “I wouldn’t know. I’ve only watched a couple of episodes.”
“WATCH MORE MERLIN REDBLAZE!!!” Aquila screeches, “IT’S SO GOOD AND IDK WHY YOU WEREN’T HOOKED!!!!”
REDBLAZE. WATCH MERLIN.
(XD)
“My sister is obsessed and I kinda sat there while she watched it, does that count?”
“Maybe.” considers Aquila, “Did you like Arthur though? Oh and Mordred? Did you enjoy it?”
“It was alright. Mordred seemed… nasty but I liked Gwen”
“YES MORDRED IS THE WORST!!!!” yells Aquila, “I found Gwen okay but she wasn’t my favourite!”
“She’s relatable” Redblaze mews
“Relatable? As in you also like Arthur? 😛” teases Aquila.
Redblaze wrinkles her nose. “You know what I mean, she’s kinda smart, kinda nervous and does her best to help even though she doesn’t really want to fight in battles. Arthur is the literal opposite of relatable and Merlin isn’t very either because I don’t have magic
or do I“I feel like Gwen was great in season 1 but after that her whole existence was to serve as a love interest of Arthur… Unfortunately I feel like I am somewhat a mixture of Merlin, Gwaine and Morgana and I do have some Arthur qualities 😛”
“CINNAMON BUNS!”
“Yes”
“Brightkit! You are quite the troublemaker here, aren’t you?” Captain purred as she padded up to the younger cat.
“I am!” Bright purrs, then yeets herself into the kitchen.
Captain watches in amusement.
“My teacher loves makeup so I filled my mom’s nail polish bottle with glue, put it on my desk, and sure enough, she confiscated it 😛 I saw her putting it on at recess!” Bright purrs while grabbing a sprinkle-covered brownie.
Willowkit, who’s presence no one was aware of till now, purrs and asks, “did you put dye in it so it didn’t look like glue? And was she mad after? What happened?” She reaches across the counter and grabs the cheddar popcorn and sprite bottle, then proceeds to put them in her large bag for kitchen raiding
Redblaze cocks her head. “That’s…… one strange teacher you got there”
(recess? Is that an American word?)
(Yep! 🙂 )
Aquila chuckles because she likes annoying teachers.
“Oh ho ho ho! What happened next?” Captain asks.
“Her nails got all sticky and she ran around screaming!” Bright answers. She takes a huge bite of her brownie.
Ttera does some tap dancing on a table for some reason.
Captain watches Ttera, completely puzzled by her tap-dancing. She cocks her head to the side.
Sunpaw begins tapping her paw to the beat because she is
cursedblessed with the gift of music.Aquila’s head starts nodding in time as she, like Sunpaw, is quite musical.
Redblaze magically conjures a piano and starts tap-dancing on that, creating music with her paws.
Captain shrugs as she grabs a trumpet and starts playing to the music, hind paws tapping as she plays the jazzy tune.
Aquila materialises her flugelhorn and joins Captain with a harmony.
Lappy humming quietly and patting her legs with her paws in time, because, like Sunpaw and Aquila, she is quite musical.
Sunpaw turns her head, her mismatched eyes shining. “You’re a musician?!?!” Sunpaw squeaks, “What do you do? I play the viola.” She then sits awkwardly, feeling like she said too much, too fast.
“Yeah!” yells Aquila, “I learn 3 instruments: violin, cornet and flugelhorn! I can also play the recorder, but nearly everyone can play the recorder. Your viola is in the same family as my violin and do you play in an orchestra? I play my violin in one!”
“Sure!” Sunpaw squeaks, her viola poofing into her hand out of thin air.
Redblaze smiles. “I can do piano!”
blackie takes out tap shoes and throws them at ttera
Hollykit stares at the group with wide eyes. “uh-“
“Hi Hollykit. Welcome to the Hazelpage. This is completely normal and not at all confusing. I am a completely normal person who is definitely not crazy. I don’t know why anyone would even think that.” meows Aquila
Redblaze ducks the tap shoes and gives a manic grin. “Yeah we’re all perfectly sane here”
“Course we are!” Aquila gains a phantom of the opera cloak and mask and proceeds to imitate the phantom’s insane laughter.
Redblaze grabs a sonic screwdriver and zaps the cloak off of Aquila
Aquila frowns and gets a Dalek shell, “Ex-ter-min-ate! Ex-ter-min-ate!” she yowls.
Captain stares at Aquila in utter confusion even though she is perfectly aware of what Dalaks are. “Run.” She whispers.
Redblaze jumps on the typo and shreds it. “You may be dales but I am armed with a PIN BADGE”
“Ex-ter-min-ate!” grins Aquila, advancing on Captain and levitating a bit off the ground to make herself taller because she’s short. “Oh my gosh Captain! Can I call you Captain Jack?!”
“Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope”
Hollykit scatters off from the.. saneness. nOPE
Ttera waves the Skathe-Hrün and a portal to Venus opens up. “Bye bye.” She hops in.
Redblaze frowns. “Mars is much better at this time of year”
“What about raxocoriofallopotorius (however you spell it 😛)?” smiles Aquila, “Don’t the slitheens (I can’t spell that either) live there?”
Redblaze grins at the Doctor Who reference. “Raxacoricofallapatorius” she mews. “And no, the Raxacoricofallpatorians live there. The Slitheen are just a family like, Smith for example.”
(You have no idea how long it took me to type that)
“Oh so the slitheens aren’t the green monster alien things?” frowns Aquila, “I thought they were! So the Raxacoricofallpatorians (I just copied and pasted that!) are the green monster aliens?”
“Well, the green monsters are Raxacoricofallapatorians from the FAMILY Slitheen. So they’re Slitheen that are Raxacoricofallapatorians”
(not confusing at all I know)
“W-w-w-what?!” asks Aquila, extremely confused.
“It’s like we’re humans, yes. But, we also have family names like….. Smith or Jones. So the Slitheen are Raxacoricofallapatorians but their family name is Slitheen.”
“Ohhhh I get it!” smiles Aquila, still dressed as a Dalek, “So in theory I could be Aquila Slitheen? And who’s to say I’m not a giant green monster?!”
Redblaze gives her a suspicious look and buzzes her with the screwdriver.
(Somebody help me, what is the screwdriver supposed to do to a raxocoricofallapatorian?? 😛)
Aquila jumps up onto a table to avoid the sonic screwdriver
“Well, It’s A SCREWDRIVER”
“How much more danger do you need”
“Screwdrivers aren’t very dangerous- unless you’re clumsy. A saw or an arrow would cause much more damage and danger.” Aquila points out.
Ttera leaps back out of the portal. “Redblaze is right, its amazing.”
“Yup, Mars is great it’s…… red”
Sunpaw begins to attempt to play A Window To The Past from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. It is not great, for she is sight reading.
Ttera sways her head along to the music. “Wow, you’re amazing. So much better than me.”
“Thanks!” Sunpaw mews self-consciously.
Captain proceeds to play her trumpet to the melody of the song, resulting in some sweet jazz tunes.
Flame parks her
spaceshipbicycle outside, after having gone on a long journey and having forgotten once again about the hazel page. “What did I miss?” she asks, sitting down at one of the tables.“Hello, Flamecloud! Welcome to the Hazelpage!” Captain meows cheerfully.
“uuuhh nothing” Redblaze yelps
“Helloooooo” yells Aquila from the other side of the room. She takes the head off her Dalek costume so she is recognisable and grins at Flame.
“What’d I miss? (What, what, what’d I miss?) What’d I miss? (I’ve come home to this) Headfirst into a political abyss! I have my first cabinet meeting today (chicka-pow!) I guess I better think of something to say I’m already on my way Let’s get to the bottom of this” Red says, singing Hamilton. (sorry, i had to 😛 )
Redblaze bops her head up and down to the beat. “Hamilton isn’t very big in England so I hadn’t even heard of it until I came onto Blogclan”
“I had! Featherpaw and Melodypaw (you know Featherpaw but not melodypaw, Redblaze) have lots of obsessions with musicals, like every month they get obsessed with a new one…” Aquila mews.
“Huh, the only musicals I’ve seen are Cats, Aladdin and Mamma Mia!”
“Okay. When quarantine is over you are coming to my house and watching Phantom of the Opera!” yells Aquila.
(Redblaze is my irl friend btw! I do know internet safety 😛)
Sunpaw grins at the Hamilton reference and begins humming the tune.
Flame grins because she was hoping someone would say something like that 😛
Hi this is Redblaze’s twin sister here stealing her computer and wreaking whovian havoc
Helllooooooooo we have so much to discuss in PE and maths because……. I watched Doctor Who!!!!
BTW being a whovian runs in the family
BTW 2 I’m also a massive Merlin fan and have watched every episode of every series twice over and some episodes even more times
Yes I agree with that- your whole family loves it! 😛