The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitinglyย and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rusticย carumย bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.
[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]
Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls,ย three floorsย and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top!ย We’ve returned, freeย from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up yourย HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.
Notice Board: Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.
“Hey guys, My Evil Twin Peck is, uh, kinda trying to kill me so, uh, Space please?” Just then, Hawkie’s evil twin, Peck, picked up a knife. Hawkie ran.
“NO KILLING!” Silvy cried frantically.
“YES! NO KILLING!” Shimmers cried. She clapped her paws and Peck disappeared.
“YES ARSON BUT NO KILLING!” squawked Raven, pointing her raven wing towards the rules on the Hazelpage.
She then lights the counters on fire with Flamey’s flaming flamethrower.
Daydream ate the knife.
“Wouldn’t that hurt??” Shimmer asks Daydream, concerned.
โFor some reason I have the power to digest anything at anytimeโ daydream replied
โUm, this looks like a bad time, but um, could I join the choas?โ Said mistfeather quietly
Springkit beams, and explains how every page is like this, and added chaos is more fun. She then causes a minor explosion.
“Of course!” Shimmers cried from over on her teal beanbag.
โThanks!โ Mistfeather pulled up a (now) slightly burnt chair and started to make paper airplanes with water balloons. She proceeded to fly the airplanes around the room, dumping the water on every cats head.
Neverpaw grabbed Hawkie and tied him to a pole. “Hey guys, I found Peck,” she said, “Should I go get the pot ready?”
Hawk slapped Neverpaw. “It’s ME. See the one without the leaves and feather? THAT ONE’S PECK.”
Mistfeather grabbed neverpaw and turned her in the direction of peck โTHATS Peck! Go get HIM!โ
*sigh* “Alright, I’ll go get him- but he probably won’t make the soup taste as good.”
“Ow! Sorry, but the evil twin usually tries to act like the good one. But since I have someone here now… wait are you a warrior? I only eat warrior soup, but your a little small to be a warrior.”
kicks peck in the shin
Tigerpaw joins ChaosClan. Ravenfrost joins ChaosClan. Stormi thinks everyone is stupid so she joins PeaceClan.
“Oh wait, ChaosClan and PeaceClan are warring against each other now?” Raven then flew to the buffet and yoinked five cartons of popcorn. “I join no clan!” Fey meowed.
and shini joins Stormi in peaceclan
“And I’ll join Whatever-I-Feel-Like-Being-At-The-MomentClan!” Shimmers mewed.
“Is this even a question?” Ember leaps over to ChaosClan.
“Peace is what I want, because Peck is STILL trying to k i l l me.” Hawk yeets themselves to PeaceClan while Peck yeets herself to ChaosClan. “I WANNA K I L L HAWK.” Peck shouted.
Foreverpaw makes Neverpaw get out of Everpaw so they can go to different clans. Neverpaw went to Chaosclan screaming, “I’m hungry! Are there any warriors nearby?” Everpaw went to Peaceclan so that she could sit in a corner and go crazy, and Foreverpaw flew up so that she could have a good view of the show.
CHAOS!!!!!
can we have a peace page here? so I can get out of this corner, under a dimound shield to not be hit by flying food, magic cheese/cupcake/whatever, flying ships, and the jambles going on here?
“NOPE!” Silvy screamed over all the noise, “HERE, HAVE A COOKIE. IT’LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.”
Silvy tossed a bag of porble cookies towards Shini.
Shimmers caught the purple cookies and stole a few from the bag before passing it to Shini. When she saw everyone gawping at her, she simply said, “What? I haven’t tasted these famed cookies yet, and this seemed like my best chance!”
“You can also have a banana peel,” Silvy told Shini, “Wear it on your head.”
“Hey! Give me that banana peel! I want to feed it to a monkey!” Leopardkit screams.
Frost whistled as she walked to into the hazelpage. “Yo my burnt cookies-” She stopped her sentence as she saw knives, flamethrowers, burning pieces of homework, and minecraft things. “And i’m out.” She walked out.
“WAIT!!” Shimmer shouted at Frost. “TAKE ME WITH YOU!!!” She shouts, running to the door as a knife and burning piece of homework fly over her head.
Frost looked back. “Oh fudge it’s getting worse!”
“Wait!” Silvy cried, “Take this banana peel with you!”
“NO.”
Viper threw open the doors to the Tavern, marching in with a flamethrower. “I HAVE COME FOR THE ENCHILADAS!” ae yells, though it is muffled because she’s eating a piece of turkey.
“PLEASE WEAR THIS BANANA PEEL ON YOUR HEAD,” Silvy mewed, forcefully sticking one onto Viper’s head.
“Why are you eating turkey, if you want enchiladas?” Shimmers asked. “Oh, and I don’t really like enchiladas, so you can have these!” She clapped her paws and made a plate of enchiladas appear for Viper.
springkit takes the nearest enchilada and tosses it to viper
Lil looked up from her stash and pulled out a hose, “Never,” she mewed glaring at the turkey-eating thief.
Twilightpaw glanced nervously at the flamethrower, then conjured a whole box of enchiladas in front of Viper so they wont burn down the place.
Viper grinned and then ate all of them in one bite. “Where’s the rest?” ae asked cheerfully.
“WAIT WE HAVE ENCHILADAS!” Foreverpaw yelled, “WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME!” She leaped next to Viper and pawcuffed their paws together and screeched, “SHOW ME WHERE THEY ARE!”
Ember smiles. “Their gone, dear.” Ember purrs hides the enchiladas in her paw/hand. She pulls out her tiny knife just in case, then summons underwater volcanos.
โWAIT WE HAVE ENCHILADAS!โ Foreverpaw yelled, โWHY DID NOBODY TELL ME!โ She leaped next to Viper and screeched, โSHOW ME WHERE THEY ARE!โ
“THEY ARE MINE!!” Viper cried, clutching her tacos and racing for the counter where the enchiladas were hidden
“NO.” She grabbed all her enchiladas and ran away.
“YES!” viper yowled, throwing a grappling hook in frost’s direction
โO Lordy, not again.โ Groans Mistfeather.
Hopfall runs and tries to take some of Viper’s enchiladas.
viper slapped hop’s paws away “UNHAND MY ENCHILADAS!!”
“Who says they’re yours?” Lil questioned, slipping under Vip to grab the box.
Snakey wacked the box out of Lil’s hand, and ran to the window. She chucked them out, watching the enchilada splatter everywhere. “For my doggos!”
Hopfall doesn’t care about things being sanitary, so she tries to eat them off the floor. But then the enchiladas promptly turn into flying rainbow sharks.
Snakey cackled as they turned from flying rainbow sharks to cat/human-eating sharks. Good thing she was a snake! She slithered over to viper and dragged her over to the now gone, enchiladas.
Hopfall sees the cat/human-eating sharks and gets out her box of invisibility and climbs into it so the sharks don’t see her.
She opens the box, and throws all of the sharks in it. They then cackle evilly.
Hopfall screams and escapes from the box and runs and ducks behind Viper.
I would rather die then give away my ENchiladas!!!! SCreamed badgerkit!!!!
“Ahem!” Silvy boomed through a sparkling pink microphone, “Please listen up, cats of the Hazelpage. As much as I love chaos, I do think we shouldn’t allow any sort of killing here. So in order to stop that, I’ve decided that everyone that doesn’t want any killing here will wear a banana peel on their head as a sign of peace.”
Silvy heaved a box from behind her, full of the peels. She took one out and slapped it on her head, then threw a few into the watching crowd.
Shimmers shoved Silvy away from the microphone. “I have a better idea!” She declared. “Killing is banned. The end. No arguments, no contradictions.” She plopped a banana peel on her head. “I’ll just wear this for fun though. Maybe it’ll be a new trend on here!”
Twilightpaw ducked as a banana peel soared of her head, wrinkling her nose in slight disgust. โUm… why banana peels?โ She hooked up the banana peel with a claw, shuddering. โYuck. Itโs slimy. I fully support no killing, but can we not do banana peels?โ
Ravenpaw dons a plastic box with banana peels in it.
Hawk puts a peel on their head. Peck yeets it off.
“Killing is gross.” Frost commented, chewing on a piece of gum.
“Then put a banana peel on your head!” Shimmers mewed.
Leopardkit catches a banana peel and stuffs it into a monkeys mouth.
“Hey!” Shimmers cried angrily. “These hats are show peace for this topic! Read Silvy’s comment!”
โAre we still doing the peel thing?โ Mistfeather took off the peel she had put on her head. โEhโ she shrugged and threw it halfheartedly at the pot, which now contained Peck, some vegetables, and a large spoon. Neverpaw was looking on hungrily.
Hopfall puts a banana peel on her head.
Daydream put a peel on her head and sat on a white fluffy cloud she conjured with her tail.
Shini nosed her head under a peel and curled up in a hole she made in the cloud
Moonkit goes on the otherside of Daydream trying to avoid Opalkit so she isn’t pummeled
Navy comes back in her Tardis. She takes one look at the chaos and decides to go somewhere else instead.
“Remember to take your banana peel to show your peace! Read Silvy’s comment for more info,” Shimmers mewed, holding it out to Navy. She was wearing a banana peel on her head.
Tigershine recited the Grammarly ad while danging from the ceiling. “Writing’s not that easy. But, Grammarly can help. This sentence is grammatically correct……..”
Shimmers glowered at her and used her magic to make Tiger drift down onto a couch. “NO GRAMMARLY ADS ON THE HAZELPAGE!” She roared.
“…It’s wordy, and hard to read.”
Shimmers growled with frustration. “Just because I use Grammarly (that’s why my grammar is good) doesn’t mean I like the ads!”
“NO!” Leopardkit screams and buries her head under pillows and throws a 20 year old cheeseburger at WildKat.
“NO GRAMMARLY ADS! NO ADS ANYWHERE!” Leopardkit roars in anger. “NO ADS IN THE HAZELPAGE!” Leopardkit magically makes it rain on Tigershines head. “IF YOU KEEP MAKING ADS, THEN YOU’LL ALWAYS HAVE A RAIN CLOUD OVER YOUR HEAD FOREVER!
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Hopfall screams.
“PECK IS S T I L L TRYING TO K I L L MEEEEEE!!!! HEELLPPPPPPP!” Hawk yowled as peck chased vin with a knife and gun.
Raven slapped Peck with a paper plate made out of pink Aqaean fish, then nonchalantly said, “Killing is illegal in the Hazelpage, because this place is supposed to be ‘kid-friendly’.”
Daydream stuffed Peck in a bedrock bag. She threw the bag into oblivion and made an indestructible barrier around Hawkie.
“I made him disappear and used special magic to seal him out of the Hazelpage unless someone let him in on purpose,” Shimmers said with a frown. “If he’s here, someone must have let him in. Was it you?”
“No, it wasn’t Hawkie,” Foreverpaw said, “It was Ne-” Just then, Neverpaw yowled, “It was Viperfrost! They let him in after they made a deal about enchiladas!” Foreverpaw sit back and said, “I might as well enjoy the show if I’m not allowed to be part of it.”
“Tell Peck, that’s rude.”
Leopardkit started chasing Peck (Somehow, Peck got in again) with her diamond sword.
Hopfall puts Peck in a box and ships him to Nebraska.
“Well, that’s a solution,” Shimmers mewed.
Snakey blinked as they walked into the barn. She stood up on a barrel of cheese and turned on the sparkly pink microphone. “Attention! Attention please!” They eyed Peck chasing Hawk suspiciously. “I would like to know what happened to my dog, Fre Sha Vaca Do? He looks a lot like my other dog, En chil ada!” She looked at Viper questionably.
“Lol I thought you meant Hawks from MHA.” Frost laughed, hugging her knees.
Wild pushes her way through the doors with her sombrero on upside down. She ducks a flying cauldron of juwarm. “Where’s the restroom?” she gargles, “My turducken is laying donuts!”
Daydream pointed to a safety bunker. “It’s in there” she mews while holding peck and neverpaw in a bedrock bag.
“So I learned three things from Anime,” Frost said in the microphone, as she was standing on the stage. “Baka means idiot, Nani means what, and Oi means hey in Japanese.”
not me yelling bakasta like noelle
OMAE wa moe shinduru