The Hazelpage

The internet is a storm of URLs, wi-fi and strings of dangerous code, whirling and thundering. Out in the wilderness you can only survive so long unaided, but in here, behind the mellow yellow windows, a safe and comforting place awaits. This place is a respite from the internet; the fire crackles invitingly and alluring rainbow-coloured drinks are poured into glasses. Exciting chatter fills the rooms from tables bustling with friends, eating from trays of warm, rustic carum bread and hearty stews. Gentle music comes from the band in the background.

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[image description: a busy tavern lit by orange light]

Come in, chat away, have a great time! The old location may have been overrun by the Codekind, but this new building has three-meter thick walls, three floors and turret bedrooms to rest in at the top! We’ve returned, free from the battles of the secret pages! A safe micro-community of equality and no judgement. Hang up your HTML-reflective suit at the door and settle in with a drink and a meal.

Notice Board:
Free candy in the bowl on the counter! What types of candy are there? Yes.

14,468 comments

  • (new chain bc im on mobile)

    Rose can’t keep a solemn expression on his face for long. Once again, his Big Grin™ lit up, too unmistakable to be anyone else’s. “Consider: a few pranks, here and there. Nothing big, just – ”

    He waves a finger, switching two drinks between people seated a few feet away from them. They hardly notice and gulp it down anyways. Both fall slack against the wooden table with a thunk.

    ” – some harmless fun. Some people do need extra help going to sleep, eh?” He tutted, pulling away the finger. “It’s for their own good.”

    Or at least, that was his excuse.

    • (I’m on mobile too 😛)

      Aquila’s eyes widen and a sly smile spreads over her face. “You know, you should be a superhero,” she chuckles, “Helping other people get to sleep like that! What other ‘good deeds’ do you have in mind?”
      She grins suddenly, her eyes sparking, “This good?” She gives a subtle click of her fingers and a person’s shoelaces tie themselves together in a messy knot, “Next time they stand up; bam! They’ll find themselves flat on their face on the floor. I might have to work on the accuracy of details, but practice makes perfect, right?”

      • Rose practically bristled at the thought of being a superhero. “Nah. That’d be too much work. And saving the world is just so cliche.”

        He watches the entire trick with mischievous glee. “Practice makes perfect,” he repeated, nodding and scratching an imaginary beard. His stomach then gave a loud rumble, and he laughed. “But you can practice without me, I’m sure. I’d say go over to the center of the room, get a good feel of the aura, while I grab a snack.”

        He teasingly shooed his apprentice away, then turned toward whoever was available. “Helllooooooo,” he shouted happily. “I’d like a menu, please.”

          • “Can I have uhhhhhhhhh some nachos?”

            Rose squinted at the menu. “I should’ve brought some glasses. And uhhhhhhhhh lemonade I guess.”

        • “It is a bit!” grins Aquila, “The villains are always my favourite characters anyway!”

          “OKAY!!!” she yells and runs to the center of the room. I’m better in my other form, she thinks and spins on her foot turning into the version of her that has rainbow curly hair and golden eyes. She smiles gleefully and grabs a plastic container. She shakes her hair back and forth, gathering the sparks in her container. When there is enough, she adds a pinch of popping candy and closes the lid. This one’s sure to go off with a bang!

          “Hey, anyone want candy?” she asks, smiling a sweet, innocent smile.

        • “Umm okay” Sunfur said and caught a banana and then sit down and said”May I order some fish and chips” he said and gave the register some money

          • “Yessss fish and chips!!!!!” grins Aquila, “I love that!!! Some fridays I have fish and chips!”

              • oops, sorrry, accidentally tripped over some, got into this huge argument with one. Common! The circle brush is better then the square! And- “Oops. Accidentally shot one out of the air with magic. Ooh, now it can’t fly! Common, me!”

              • “I love bananas,” Pinestripe quickly said, “They’re one of the best choices for an easy snack.”

            • “Can I have two milkshakes and an apple pie please? Do you even have these stuff? Maybe potato’s if you don’t?” *Looks over Rose’s shoulder at the menu* “Ahh, yes. Two apple pies actually. And what dose that say? some of your potato juice. was it called?” “I have have 57 pixels if you want to keep them all.”

              After getting some food, Crystalpaw explored the place. “Is there any sort of magic teacher around here? I know some, but would like to know a lot more!”

              • “Magic teacher?” Aquila’s eyes widen, “HEY, ROSE. SOUND LIKE A JOB FOR US?” she yells, a small smile passing her face as she thinks of all the evil magic they could teach to Crystalpaw.

                • Being summoned by name, Rose poofed into existence again, cloak on.

                  “Very well,” he accepted the challenge, sideye-ing Redblaze curiously. “Are you sure nobody will interfere? I’d hate for what happened to my last apprentice to happen to you.”

                • “I can deal with Redblaze.” Aquila shrugs, “If she interferes, then let’s just say she won’t be doing anything again…” An evil glint spreads over her gold eyes for a second before she quickly hides it, her usual mischievous spark returning to them. “Your last apprentice of magic? Why, what did they become? Did the magic consume them?” she asks, more relaxed about this than she should be.

                • Rose?shuddered as he recalled his last apprentice’s dying wish. “Something like that,” he whispered solemnly.

                  “But anyway! What type of magic do you want to learn? And if any, do you have a proficiency in magic? We’ll see if you are compatible.”

                • Aquila uses her telepathic powers to read Rose’s mind, and her ears droop sadly as she reads.
                  “Compatible?!” she yells, “You never did any tests on me! I could have died!” She breaks off realising how much she sounds like Clary from Shadowhunters and thinking that she does not want to be like Clary at all.

    • “How do you play that?” Aquila laughs, still in her rainbow form. Her energy was zapping though, so she might need to put on her ‘normal’ look soon…

          • Are you all doing this in rhyme?
            Asks Aquila, looking at the time.
            You know, this is rather hard,
            The only rhyming word I can think of is card.

              • Aquila yelps and moves back with a leap,
                Get away Dalek, you’re no better than a sheep.
                She feels her electricity buzz around her,
                And sends it at Redblaze with a triumphant purr.

                (You should be, it’s good!!)

                • Ice?! Well then catch me if you can,
                  Though more likely you’ll run into a frying pan!
                  I’ll warn you though, I’m rather fast,
                  There’s not much I can’t get past!

                • The important thing to me is not my speed,
                  A little magic is all I need,
                  And maybe a TARDIS too,
                  So I can travel in time and escape you!

                • Nah, your poetry is completely fine,
                  At least, it’s a whole lot better than mine,
                  Travelling in time must be very fun,
                  Like seeing the creation of the sun.

                • Riverpond says that this world is all she knows.
                  Soon after that, it starts to snow.
                  She made it inside though,
                  Something I fear,
                  She turns the snow into flying reindeer.

                • Pah! My rhyming is bad
                  It kinda makes me pretty mad
                  When I read over what I write
                  It gives me an awful fright

                  A Flying Deer?
                  Now that’s something to fear!
                  Watch out for your head
                  I’ll lure it out with carrots instead!

                • Aquila smiles at Riverpond’s name,
                  I think of Doctor Who but that’s my current obsession to blame!
                  You see, the two names of River Song,
                  Put them together and “Riverpond”’s not wrong!

                  (River Song’s two names are a River Song and Melody Pond, for all of you who don’t know (basically everyone on this page minus Raze, oof 😛))

            • “Yeah, Red, I’m writing a show.
              I’ve only ever discussed it with Pinestripe and Clo.”
              Captain mews, as she looks down at the floor
              And asks Redblaze, “Hey! Do you like s’mores?
              Or anything, really, you’re a good cat.
              And guess what? I’m paying! How ‘bout that?”
              She stifles a laugh, “But that rhyme was kinda bad.
              But without bad rhymes, is there fun to be had?”

                • Captain laughs, “So, do you want some food?
                  It would help you be in a better mood.”
                  Captain then yowls, “Aw jeez! That was horrible!
                  The words that I put together just made this rhyme terrible.
                  Were you even ever in a bad mood before?
                  I’m guessing you were, you just stared at the floor.”

                  that was actually horrible

                • “Of course! Have a seat, I’ll be right there.”
                  Captain mews as she messes around with her hair.
                  Smoothing her fur out, she rushes to a table
                  Snatches the menus, runs back, but is unable
                  Ttera was on the other side of the room
                  In front of Aquila, behind a lone broom.
                  Suddenly, Captain feels a burst of speed
                  She thinks to herself, This is what I need!
                  She returns to the table with menus and mews,
                  “Did you hear the… well… incredible news?
                  I’m faster than Sonic and faster than Flash!
                  I could run a one million mile dash!”
                  Suddenly, her powers are reduced to a shred.
                  Captain feels exhausted, and lays her head
                  On the table, the one that was close to that broom
                  That was, moments ago, on the far side of the room… where it happened…

                • Wow captain Redblaze gives a yelp
                  In poetry I may need some help
                  You don’t seem to have a problem though
                  I bet you could rhyme even in snow
                  That rhyme is very long
                  For that, your mind must be very strong

                • Why yes, Raze, I agree,
                  Your all so much better at this than me!
                  Captain, do you like Hamilton though?
                  I saw the reference and was like “whoa”
                  As you can probably tell,
                  Me and poetry don’t get along very well.

                • Hamilton reference? Oh I see
                  I’ve only watched part of it on my TV
                  The room where it happens is a good song
                  Though some of the songs are just too long
                  (I don’t actually think that I just needed something to rhyme :P)

                • My autocorrect does stuff to me too,
                  Suggests warrior cat names, what ever I do,
                  Somebody help me with this awful way of speaking,
                  My non existent talent is now really weakening.

                • “Redblaze! Pixel Perfect is about rhyming! Not referencing!
                  Remember, when you rhyme, you can rhyme almost anything.
                  That reference set you back a few points, sadly,
                  But please, don’t think you failed so badly.
                  Your rhymes are better than what you give credit for,
                  Now, I’ll give you another turn, now, try again, get better!”
                  Captain yowls, whiskers twitching with glee
                  As she grabs a whistle, plays referee.
                  “Redblaze, it’s your turn!” Captain points out to Raze,
                  “And remember what I said! You never fail to amaze!”

                  (That was… interesting.)

  • (New thread again 😌✌)

    Rose scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “Uhhhhh… oops?”

    He shrugged carelessly. “Wouldn’t be the first time I…. forgot something. Hey, wait… Wasn’t I gonna teach someone magic?”

    He searched the room like a man on a safari, hands shielding his eyes from the tavern glare.

  • Lux slumped down in a chair. She orders some waffles and an orange juice. She slaps three credits on the table, her recent travels to the Star Wars universe left her with a decent amount of credits, but very few regular American dollars.

  • Pear slams the door, and glances at the menu. “Shoot! I forgot my wallet AGAIN!” she said. This is the fifth time she forgot it. “Can I pay in stickers?” Pear asks halfheartedly.

    • “No,” Cheetah muttered drily, cramming the dirty dishes into the dishwasher and haphazardly slamming the door shut. She raised an eyebrow, “Unless they’re really good stickers.”

        • “Well, it’s not like there’s much of a difference between virtual money and virtual stickers, not to mention we only serve virtual food and drinks here, so I guess it’s all pointless anyway.”

            • “Do you want anything or not?” Cheetah asked, acting like she wasn’t secretly very interested in those stickers.

              • “Can I have, like, this awesome metal pig with origami wings AS A PET? I do not eat cool pigs,” Pear asked.

                • “I mean… sure? I guess anything you can imagine in this fictitious tavern is at your disposal.” She sighed. “Just snap your fingers or wave a wand or whatever. Though that does bring into question why a staff is really needed if people just randomly create things and money is meaningless.”

  • Lavenderkit walks in, a serious expression on her face “I want.. A CREAM DONUTTTTTT” she yells. “Cream donuts are the most important part of the food groups!” Lavenderkit try’s to maintain the serious expression, but is sadly failing horribly. “Okay, fine I was joking, sort of. I do want a cream donut though!” Lavenderkit smiles. “So, what animal should I summon today..?” She looked at everyone waiting answers. “I can summon anything.” As an example she summoned an Eevee.

  • Red plops in the corner and pulls her computer out of midair, she plugs in her ever present purple headphones and starts listening to Heather the Musical while attempting to write a Once Upon a Time fanfiction. She begins levitating in the air with her legs cris cross applesauce style, surrounded by purple light. “Well,” she says looking around. “I guess I’m a nightlight now.” she says and procedes to type out a whopper of a paragraph. Sneakily, she uses her magic to put a banana peel on the ground in front of her to see if anyone happens to slip on it. She grins evilly and says “They haven’t seen anything yet, I will rise to be the prank master!”

    • “Ooooohhh A NIGHTLIGHT!!”Lavenderkit rushed over to hold her book under her “Thanks Red!!” She smiled

      • “No problem Lav!” Red replies with a smile (hanging upside down because bending your head directly down is painful)

    • Aquila grins at her friend and brings her laptop over near Red. She sits against the wall, opens it and turns down the brightness as Red and the laptop combined create a strong level of brightness that hurts her eyes. She clicks on chrome, gets to bbc I player and clicks the next episode of Doctor Who. She then plugs her headphones in to save everyone else’s ears and starts watching.

      • Dove walks over to Aquila and Red and says “Hey! Is that Doctor who?? I used to love that show” She purred , her tail curling up in delight that she finally found someone who shared somewhat of her interests.
        Then, she pulls out a random photo she had of her and her father watching Doctor Who and shows it to her.

        • Aquila pauses her episode of Doctor Who and her mouth forms a shocked o. “Do you?!” she gasps, swiftly removing her headphones and wearing them around her neck like a scarf. “Who was your favourite character? And your favourite Doctor?” she asks excitedly, “My favourite character is Rose and my favourite Doctor is eleven! I also love Donna, the Master, Rory, Amy, the Daleks, Mickey, Martha and so many more…” She gestures with her hands avidly as she speaks, “I’m only at season 6 episode 5 but I love spoilers and I know nearly all of them!”

            • “I have nothing else to do right now, okay?” grins Aquila, “And anyhow, right now I’m on holiday and my laptop’s at home so I can’t watch it!”